One Hundred Little Dolls

Daily Grinding

2008-01-11T17:34:00.000-08:00

Lately I've been thinking a lot about why I've been so silent. It just sort of happened that all of the sudden I couldn't get any inclination to blog, to write, to do any sort of productive thought processing. When I started working in the clinic I thought that I'd have a lot of things to jot down, specifically about my education in college in regards to women's health versus working in the middle of it. Certainly I didn't know exactly what to expect when I started my job, and now I've learned that I can't have any expectation as to what any day is going to be like. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I've come across some shocking and difficult situations and I'm trying to learn how to deal with it. In the past I was able to write about it, but right now it's too soon.

And it feels stupid to write it, but I'm going to anyway. I just had no idea. Studying and learning about domestic violence in college and job training is completely different from when you actually find yourself taking the blood pressure of a woman who lies to you about the bruises on her body.

One of the best things about feminism for me has always been that it has given me a sense of hope. It has always been a revolution to me. My job and feminism intertwine and I relish that. Yet I am amazed at how far I've come down to where I only feel and notice burden--the weight of it in the lives of the women I meet, and my own that I carry with me.

It's the New Year and damn if this blog needs an update

2008-01-02T07:10:00.000-08:00

It's been months since I've posted. I never even considered in the past how office jobs and school fueled my internet hobby, as now when I get home I don't even want to check my email or look at my computer.

But it's a new year and I made new resolutions and I'm typing this post on a new computer. I plan, starting now, to try to update this blog at least every other week and I'm dedicating at least one night a week to the poor (yet determined!) and important Jade Reporting. I pinky swear.

Pitfalls

2007-10-16T07:51:00.000-07:00

Apologies for being away for so long. With the new job comes new stress due to a steep learning curve and I’m adjusting to an environment that is completely unlike anything I’ve been in before. Whereas I used to sit in a cubicle staring at the clock, I am now running around, arranging charts, answering phones and grabbing a quick sip of water or bite to eat when there’s a small break in the rush of patients. It’s definitely challenging, and I’m hoping to hit my stride soon.

To deal with the stress I’ve broken out my used copy of Dreamfall: The Longest Journey for the X-Box. I bought it for under 20 bucks on the suggestion of my visiting and adorable younger gamer cousin. It didn’t really bother me that I didn’t first play The Longest Journey, as I’ve started a lot of series playing sequels first.

I immediately felt that I could identify with Zoë (though not because she first appears in her underwear!). The first things that you find out about her is that she dropped out of school, broke up with her boyfriend, and moved back in with her dad. She’s lost and disillusioned, which is, I’ve found, a common emotional domain of many 20-somethings. The story of Dreamfall is excellent: it’s filled with cross-dimensional political conspiracy. While not all characters were completely developed, I noticed that there was a definite effort to give specific attitude and background to many of the NPCs—something that is usually ignored in many other games.
That doesn’t save it, however, from some huge complaints that I have. In a game that features so much diversity in its characters, I was appalled that the developers relied on some pretty insensitive and stereotypical portrayal of Chinese people. How many games do I have to play that feature a Chinese NPC wearing ancient-China style robes and hair, sporting extremely slanty eyes and speaking with a mouth full of buck teeth high-pitched and quivering English? Another aspect that confused me was how the very beginning of the game, which takes place in Tibet, features NPCs talking in their native tongue. I liked hearing an unfamiliar language. I initially thought it cool that a game that travels the world would feature different languages instead of just pretending that everyone speaks English. Yet after the first chapter in the game that completely vanished.

There was a lot of good in Dreamfall: specially the complex story, the game’s focus on women characters, and it’s genuine diversity. While playing the game, I kept comparing it to Indigo Prophecy, and found Dreamfall much more satisfying. However, there was a lot lacking too. Despite two of the main characters being women, the game didn’t lack sexism. Despite the game’s push towards multiculturalism, it had racist elements and was specifically grounded in white privilege. While these aspects really did turn me off to the game in a lot of ways, I have to admit that I’m hooked. I ordered The Longest Journey (soon to come in the mail) and am awaiting the next installment(s) of the series. I’m anxious to continue the narrative and see if it’s shortcomings continue or are improved upon.

Full-time

2007-09-19T20:05:00.000-07:00

The job search is over. I'm officially gainfully employed, with health benefits and everything. My official title is that of a reproductive health assistant, which means I do a little bit of a lot of things at a women's health clinic.

I feel lucky to get the position and damn lucky to have to opportunity to work a feminist job, doing something I'm passionate about, for a company with a mission statement I agree with.

Some of the Same

2007-09-14T07:43:00.000-07:00

Yesterday my brother let me come over to do some (free!) laundry. So in the midst of suds and folding I checked out a couple of demos on his 360.

Beautiful Katamari was first. I really like the controller for the 360 and think it’s a vast improvement over both controller models for the original Xbox. But in the context of Katamari, it was a bit awkward to play on a controller where the analog sticks aren’t side by side. I realize I’m being picky—it’s something I’m sure most people won’t have any problems with.

It was also disappointing to see that in Katamari’s third console incarnation that the camera is still wonky. And even though the graphics are bit brighter and a bit shinier, Beautiful Katamari is the same game as the first two. I don’t think online capabilities will do much in revolutionizing the formula either. It’s sure to be some fun, but there’s no way I’d shell out sixty bucks to play a game I essentially already own.

The demo I was truly excited to play was Eternal Sonata. This is the game I’d own a 360 for. Made by Tri-Crescendo (one of the two companies behind the Baten Kaitos games), I expect a ton out of it and its original premise of Chopin having delirious deathbed dreams. It. Is. Gorgeous. The visuals are dreamy and colorful. The music swirls and bends. The battles are fast-paced and genuinely fun. You only have a specific amount of time for your turn, so it’s similar to the Baten Kaitos series except it doesn’t feature cards. (People interested in the game probably already know about the light/dark features of battles as well.)

Yet I was crushed by what I gleaned from the gender roles of Eternal Sonata. The demo features no story, but it’s easy to tell what the prescribed roles are for the three characters that you control. The leader of the group is Allegretto, a pretty boy with a sword. We then have Polka, our cute and weak heroine who heals and whacks foes with an umbrella. Finally, there’s Beat, an eager and adorable young boy with an oversized gun. I love me my JRPGs and am not surprised with the common gender clichés that are often presented. But seriously, I’d like to see more. That said, I don’t know if there will be other characters that might push the gender envelope, but as of this moment, I’m doubting it.

After playing the Eternal Sonata demo, I’m left having to make a compromise that I always have to make. I know that when I do get a 360 down the line, I’ll most likely pick this game up. It has so much else going for it that I know I’ll enjoy, but I’m going to have to end up pushing the gender issues present in the game to the back of my mind. This has happened before with games that I’ve particularly enjoyed--Dragon Quest 8 and Tales of Symphonia, I’m looking at you.

While it’s true that I’m fully capable of enjoying a game despite problematic gender presentations, I’m tired of having to make so many compromises. And I know that I’m not alone—other gamers that are queer, identify as female and aren’t white often have to make the same type of aggravating decision when it comes to choosing a game to play.

Shudder

2007-09-07T23:57:00.000-07:00

Scrolling through my RSS Feeds I come across some potentially upsetting news:

Warner Bros. Pictures has acquired the film rights to the anime classic Robotech, with Tobey Maguire producing through his Maguire Entertainment.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, the actor is considering the lead role in the futuristic tale of giant robots and alien invaders. The studio plans on the sci-fi epic becoming a tentpole franchise.

Warner Brothers? Tobey Maguire? Tobey Maguire as Rick? And I can just see Minmei being cast as not-Chinese. This screams bad idea.

And in non-nerd news, I quit my temp job this week. Here's to some self-dignity, an empty wallet, and a stack of resumes.

Rat Racing

2007-08-23T12:01:00.000-07:00

Warning: I'm about to launch into some post-grad, twentysomething-crisis whining.

In February, I was hired on as a temp-to-perm at a big corporate company. I was damn happy because a steady job with benefits seemed just out of my reach. When I started, I found that there was another temp in my department. I was a bit deflated to learn that he'd already been working for 7 months as a temp to perm, but I pushed some of my doubts aside--I sat near the HR department and saw that new people were being hired all the time. I figured I just had to wait my turn.

Months have gone by and I've become incredibly disillusioned and bored. I'm no fan of corporate culture, and I'm continuously stressed out because I never know which project I'm given is going to be my last. But I've been sticking with it because no matter how shitty I feel, the job is paying the bills. I have been applying to other jobs, as I want some stability and need insurance hardcore, but noting is panning out. The internship is the exact thing I've been looking for, but the organization is new and has no money as of yet to hire me on full time, though they've expressed interest.

Recently the other temp in my department quit--he was simply sick of doing the same job for a year straight that is obviously integral to the operation of the department. He would inquire every once and awhile to see if the company would be interested in hiring him permanently, but they'd also turn him down. After he left, I found myself sitting in a situation where maybe, just maybe, I could move into his position, where the temping would be more stable, or perhaps I'd even get hired full time.

It's not going to happen. I found out today that they already hired someone new. Not as a temp, but as a full-time, fully benefited, employee. It doesn't matter that I'm already familiar with the work or that I've been here for six months. They're not going to hire me. I asked about my job performance, and I was told that I'm doing excellent work. So I don't know what it is--maybe they think I'm too young and am therefore more likely to move on sooner than someone else? Or is it something else?

Either way, I feel like crap. I check the job listings and nothing seems promising. My self-esteem has hit the rocks. I've developed some chronic health conditions since graduating, but have put off going to the doctor because I can't afford it, and I'm going to need to keep putting it off. Plus, I'm still endlessly stuck in temp limbo--who knows when they'll not need me here any longer?

That was three days ago? A Rundown of Wizard World Chicago

2007-08-15T19:51:00.000-07:00

This past weekend I set aside my internship and other responsibilities to attend yet another year of Wizard World Chicago with Shions_Glasses. It’s awesome to see every year more and more women and girls attending the con—the first year I went there didn’t seem to be a lot of us, but this year there was lots. It’s a good time to be a fan girl.

I don’t know if it was just me, but Wizard World seemed tiny this year. There just didn’t seem to be as many panels or booths. Hell, the Nintendo booth wasn’t even there. A shame because I was looking forward to getting some more free Pokemon cards and downloading a rare Pokemon or mystic ticket for my copy of Diamond.

Marvel’s booth had me a bit disappointed. I’m always impressed with free swag, even if it’s just DC’s Countdown pins and Batman temporary tattoos. I was crossing my fingers for a John Cassidy X-Men poster or something like that. There was a glossy poster for Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter that was definitely cheesecakey, but a little outside my taste.

I was surprisingly impressed with Sony’s booth. They seemed to aiming for some accessibility by being kid friendly. The PaRappa the Rapper port for the PSP was getting a strong push, as was the strategy-RPG Jeanne D’Arc. I grabbed a gorgeous poster for Jeanne D’Arc, and Shions_Glasses was given a PaRappa t-shirt that’s about five times too large just for posing for a few pictures with the PaRappa mascot.

On Saturday afternoon we made sure to stop by the DC booth to get Will Pfeifer’s signature. Other than that, we didn’t have too much to do with the big two. Instead of going to any of the panels we spent our time flipping through back issues and wandering around Artist Alley. We picked up about 20 issues of Gotham Cental (all for $1.50!) and grabbed Spider-Woman: Origin and the Metal Gear Solid TPB for half-off. In the Artist Alley I searched out David Mack (as I do every year) and bought the second and third volumes of Kabuki. Before we left for the evening we caught some Beck (dubbed, yuck) in the anime screening room. I’m a bit annoyed that they were only showing Funimation licensed anime this year. What about Manga and Bandai? They were there too.

Saturday night was probably my favorite part of the convention, though it wasn’t specifically Wizard World-related. In my part of Chicago they were having a neighborhood festival, and in celebration my local comic book shop invited their regulars to come hang out and drink some beers. There wasn’t too many of us there, which was more than alright with me. I was content with talking the whole while with a woman who didn’t even stop at home to change out of her Catwoman costume. The whole experience was a bit surreal: where I grew up I bought my comics from a video rental store, so there was never a place for me to go and hang out and talk geek.

Sunday was more of buying. For 35% off we picked up the first volume of Monster (manga is always seriously lacking at WW), Coward, the three TPB volumes of Bruce Wayne: Fugitive and Tales of the Slayers. We also stopped by Artist Alley and grabbed a copy of Winter Beard by Cathy Hannah and The Exploits of Aimless Boy by John Aston Golden, who is actually a regular at my comic book store. We waited in line for the Wheel of Doom and I won my cat a rubber band to play with (the topic I chose was Lunar: The Silver Star and they unfortunately didn’t know what the hell I was talking about) and Shions_Glasses won a hardcover book of Wizard covers, which he promptly gave away.

It was after this point that the con went sour. We stopped one last time at the Sony booth to check out the Heavenly Sword demo. Some guys came up behind us, and one of them decided that it’d be a ton of fun to verbally harass me. I don’t feel like going into too much detail, but his comments involved such things as upskirt shots, masturbation, and rape. Unable to contain my anger, I told him to please shut the hell up, and went on to furiously explain that rape is not a joke, it’s a hate crime, etc. but as he only seemed to get more belligerent with my every response. So I went to security and he disappeared into the milling crowd. At least I can say that security did take me seriously and even profusely apologized.

Yet getting harassed sucked any fun that was left out of the con. We did go afterward to check out the Fullmetal Alchemist movie, but it was difficult to enjoy.

With all the internet harassment that’s been going on lately in the game and comics community—the avalanche of racist comments regarding Resident Evil 5, the hijacking of GayGamer.com, and Girl-Wonder.org getting hacked— being harassed at the con just fit in too perfectly.

Shame on you internet, I thought you were cool

2007-08-01T12:11:00.000-07:00

I found a great blog today as I was reading up on Resident Evil 5 reactions. It's called microscopiq, and combines my two favorite things: art and video games into one cool blog. The article on RE5 is also stellar, as he points out many of the issues inherent with the concept of the game. The best point against the game is how the characteristics of the super zombies of RE4, transferred to a black person, creates a zombie that resembles many of the negative black stereotypes.
"With bulging eyes, simian super strength, and a room temperature IQ, we’ve been portrayed as savages beyond redemption."
What is not so cool, and that has made me as angry as a space banished Hulk, are the comments on that post. This post has gotten waaaay more attention than any of the other posts on the blog, and the majority of the comments are telling him how wrong he is. All I can think is "How dare they." What gives these people the right, to come to his blog and tell him that he is wrong; that he shouldn't be offended by obvious racist imagery. Most of the comments boil down to, "No. You don't/shouldn't feel the affects of racism, shut up!" It's inconceivable. Who else would feel the affects of the imagery in this game if not an African American. Commenter after commenter kept admitting to being white and claiming that they have never know anyone to be racist, that racism doesn't exist, and that these images of a race that they don't belong to aren't racist. Well of course you don't feel it if you're white, but it exists. It exists when you go onto an African American blog throwing your whiteness all over the place and saying not to talk about things like racism and be a good boy. Does anyone else see the absurdity in someone defending a game where a white person goes into a black space and starts wrecking havoc, when they themselves are going into a black space and wrecking havoc. This sounds like the perfect game for these people, right up their ally. It's pretty clever of the power structure to admit that racism is bad, but then also claim that it doesn't exist. This leaves those who are affected by racism without even a voice to speak out against it, because, according to the power structure, there's nothing to speak out against. A good rule to follow from now on is that if any marginalized person calls out some sort of oppression of their group, maybe everyone else should just shut up, listen, and at least consider the possibility.

Didn't I Already write this post?

2007-07-27T08:32:00.000-07:00

I was very excited about Rogue Galaxy when I first heard about it. Level 5 left me in love after Dark Cloud 2 so my hopes were high. However, Rogue Galaxy did not turn out how I envisioned. It falls short of Dark Cloud 2 in gameplay, story, and most importantly: feminist stuff. Dark Cloud 2 did a great job of balancing between its girl and boy characters. Max and Monica were given equal attention in both story and gameplay, thus creating a gender equality which went to defy some game conventions. Monica was fully clothed, (not counting secret cat outfit) and fought with a sword, a rarity in video games. While Max was the brains compared to her brawn, and he fought with a nontraditional weapon, an honor usually assigned to a women. Developer: "Girls can't handle anything as phallic as a sword, we better give her an umbrella."

Because of these and other great elements that seemed to intentionally defy conventional roles, their follow up game seemed to be a sure hit. How wrong I was.

[spoiler warning]

Meet Lilika. The sexualized, exoticised only woman of color within your party, and one of two women out of 8 playable characters. Her origin story isn't much better. Of course the only woman of color in the game has to hail from a "backwards" tribal jungle planet. A planet that the white skinned offworlders end up saving. Jaster and friends expose to the poor savages that the god they worshiped was none other than a vile monster causing many problems in the village. So using the power of an almighty gun, Jaster helps the silly silly savages by killing their god. I've found that Imperialism leaves quite a bad aftertaste.

The character of Lilika is fairly interesting, but how can she be taken seriously while looking the way she does. I mean a tiger skin bra? Really? How can the game itself, nay, all of video games be taken seriously when characters are portrayed in this manner. This is why I get embarrassed to tell people I'm a gamer.

I had a possible ray of hope in acquiring her alternative outfits, but I should have known better. I have to say that giving the only woman of color in the game an outfit called "Royal Servant Clothes" is pretty insulting. On top of that, her bow is pretty worthless in combat. The one saving grace is that she doesn't have bunny ears. Shame on you Level 5, I thought you were better than this.

Elebits are cute and creepy.

2007-07-19T08:32:00.000-07:00

It’s been a harried week of trying to get used to my new work load, and trying to stay optimistic in light of learning about the sad state of women’s reproductive rights and health care are in this country.

In an attempt to either cheer me up (or to distract me from doing my work) Shions_glasses rented Elebits. I haven’t had the chance to play many Wii games. Sure, I’ve put some hours in on Wii Sports, played a bit of Twilight Princess and beat Trauma Center, but that’s been about it. I can’t afford the prince of new games, and the price of used games for the Wii hasn’t been much better.

Elebits has a lot for me to love, namely its cuteness and penchant for making messes. It seems to borrow a lot of its atmosphere from Katamari and Pikmin. I was a bit worried about the controls, seeing that I dislike first person perspective in video games (ack, tunnel vision) and therefore suck at FPSs, but it’s actually easy to get the hang of. I still feel limited by the perspective, and probably would still prefer a behind the shoulder camera angle, but it doesn’t really impede my enjoyment.

One complaint I do have is the voice acting. It’s worse than the first Baten Kaitos game. Hell, its worse then those budget kids’ shows on PBS. Everyone sounds creepy. And the story? Basically, a kid feels neglected by his parents and is understandably pissed about it. What better way to get back at Mom and Dad than by tearing the house apart? However, it’s not all innocent revenge. The game has been hinting that Elebits are acting strangely--dear god, are these hunks of pastel cuteness going to attack me?

I may not be able to answer that, as we have to return the game Saturday, but I’m pretty sure that if I ever find Elebits in the bargain bin, I’m gonna snap it up.

E3 Reactions: We are PR

2007-07-16T08:40:00.000-07:00

I’ve never been happier with my cable TV and my unemployment than this last week. Those two factors allowed me to watch G4’s live coverage of E3. It has been a fantasy of mine to attend E3--a fantasy that hatched many intricate yet unfulfilled plans and schemes by me and my comrades. So it was a real treat to watch the big press conferences live. It was also an eye opening look into the companies that produce video games.

Nintendo was amazing. I completely understand that Nintendo is a corporation that is out for making money and all those things that the communist in me should hate. But man oh man, if sci-fi ever comes true and corporations start ruling the world, I would totally enlist in Nintendo’s army. It was delightful to listen to corporate talking heads spouting rhetoric about inclusion. Sure, they had the required “our company is the best company in the world and invest in us” speak, but the majority of their corporate message was about the inclusion of everyone in video games. “Everyone is a gamer” was the catch phrase pushed by Reggie, Miyamoto and Iwata. I wish every billion dollar company had that motto and pursued, researched, and most importantly respected all demographics. I think respect is the main difference I felt between Nintendo’s and Sony’s presentations. Sony’s press conference was terrible. Beyond all the ho hum games (except MGS4: war commentary with vampires and cyborgs, yum) Sony had what I’d like to call a bad attitude. The conference started with the worst speaker I’ve ever seen, Jack Tretton, as his Home avatar checking out some “hot chicks.” Yep, Sony started the biggest news event of the year with some good ol’ fashion cat calling. As Jack walked outside to Home’s hub, three female avatars were standing in a line all dancing, and he proceeded to “hello ladies” them. Throughout the presentation he kept referencing the “hot chicks,” and mentioned that he hoped they would stop by his hip Home pad, which was decked out in the finest of yuppie fashion. The main message I received from Sony is that they don’t regard women as serious consumers of their products and that they love materialism. It was jarring to move from watching a woman play Metroid Prime 3 on stage to Sony’s boy’s club attitude. My assumption is that Sony was upset at the record low levels of misogyny at this year’s E3, with the lack of booth babes and Nintendo’s radical ideas. Sony just needed to make up for it.

I am so disappointed in Sony. I used to be a huge fan of the Playstation and Playstation 2. I’ve said awful things about the N64 in my day, and only respected the Gamecube from afar. But now, I can’t see myself ever buying a PS3, and feeling a little ashamed of my past loves. Nintendo is a company I can feel alright giving money to, based on their mature look at the industry. We used to have a good thing Sony, why did you have to go and ruin it.

More on Sony hating me

2007-07-12T18:52:00.000-07:00

Alice at Wonderland commented the other day on Sony's "Because your Girlfriend bores you shitless" ad. She also points out that there's a possibility that the ad may not be official:

Beenabadbunny says, while the ads are real, they possibly don't belong to
Sony. A Sony hired-blogger is denying they're official... going from N'Gai's original post, the ads are posted on AdsoftheWorld.com, which claims to showcase worldwide work; however, any user can upload an example.

The blog in question, Three Speech, only says that "we’re reliably informed, however, it’s not a bona fide PlayStation advert."

No names, no official press release--why am I going to believe that the ads are a fake? We all remember Sony's so-called "hip hop" fan site, right?

Besides, even if the ads aren't official, I'm concerned that Sony isn't concerned about their image. I'd like to think that that Sony would see these ads as offensive enough to their consumers to say something, instead of releasing word on a "semi-official" blog.

Good News Everyone

2007-07-08T07:23:00.001-07:00

I’ve landed an internship that starts next week at a brand new organization that aims to train health care workers so that they can provide reproductive health care to underserved women who desperately need it. This includes providing abortions, for access is extremely limited in the Midwest, especially for rural women and women in poverty. The organization will also provide lectures, workshops, classes, counseling and other activities. I’m ecstatic to be a part of this organization—women’s health and reproductive rights has always been an important issue to me and one that I intensely studied in college.

For the time being I’ll still be temping 40 hours a week in addition to my internship, but as time goes on the organization that I’ll be working for may be able to take me on full time. (Fingers crossed.) I still plan to keep my fan girl fire burning—I’ll try to keep on posting here once a week, hanging out at the Iris boards and will still be updating Jade Reporting. (You know we’re looking for volunteers, right?)

Why do you hate me Sony?

2007-06-29T20:34:00.000-07:00

A quick run down of some of Sony's advertising includes:

-an American ad campaign for the PSP which featured dust balls that can be easily interpreted as racist caricatures of Mexican people.

-the UK's various sex-based ads on buses with slogans such as “Your girlfriend’s white bits here.”

-the objectifying and race-based Black vs. White PSP ad in the Netherlands

-not to mention the topless waitresses featured at the God of War II release party

And now there's this running in India, complete with a tagline that reads"Because your girlfriend bores you shitless."

What. The. Hell. Sony.

There's lots of great discussion over at the Iris boards about the ad, along with some plans to get a letter campaign going. I'll post more info about it here when it happens.

hat tip: the f-word

Changing of the Green Guard

2007-06-18T12:34:00.000-07:00

One of my pet peeves in comic books is to fall in love with a character, book, and creative team, only to have it ripped from my overzealous heart. A few examples throughout my life: Rucka and Brubaker on the Batman comics, McDaniel on Nightwing, Lobdell and Bachelo on Generation X, and Vaughn on Ultimate X-Men. I understand that the changing of the guard on titles is the nature of comics and the price you pay for having superhero books that will never end. But what really gets me is when a stellar writer or team of writer and artist leave a book and are replaced by the crappiest comic book makers this side of Image. The worst case has to be Hama replacing Lobdell on Generation X. That was a shame.

I can smell this happening again and soon to one of my favorite books out there. I was stunned about how good She-Hulk actually was and took it upon myself to pick up all of the back issues and danced when I found the trade paper backs. It wasn't a perfect run, but the comic was unique, refreshing and fun. It revitalised my love for comics after reading countless clones of over-the-top dramatic comics. But now Slott is leaving to write Spider-man, a character I like, yet I find She-Hulk to be much more interesting and in greater need of good writers.

Slott's replacement is Peter David. I know that some might think having the guy who wrote He-Hulk for longer than I've been alive to be a good thing, but I just can't help but worry. I have my doubts that he can maintain the greatness of the book, and I know for a fact that the tone will be different. For instance, the postmodern jabs at comics and Marvel will be MIA. Marvel is lacking in great female super heroes--they need everyone they can get--and I feel that we're going to lose one more. (RIP Jean.)

Paprika: Not just for Deviled Eggs

2007-06-12T10:00:00.000-07:00

If you ever watched the A-Team, you might remember the episode where Murdock becomes a chef and keeps asking for paprika. Because of this, it became the funniest and best spice in my mind. Now I have a new reason to love it that blows the A-Team reference out of the water, a feat that I would not have thought possible. The new Sotoshi Kon film, Paprika, was oh so yummy. I was able to see it in the theater this weekend and it was a dream come true. Paprika takes a wonderful, surrealist look into humanity's desires and the collective unconcious, but lacked any of Breton's misogyny.

Almost all of Kon's work, like surrealism, adds the fantastical into a realistic setting. The concept of Paprika allowed him to fully realize this idea. Kon understands the freedom animation allows and creates something truly unique. I found it bizarre how the morphing images and situations of the dreams made as much sense to me as the "real world" scenes of the movie. That dichotomy was questioned, and subsequently became very unstable. This continued with the characters. They straddled the line between being both archetype and fully humans. There were a definite struggle between the characters in achieving the ideal role for their gender or place in the world.

*Spoilers Below*

In Paprika, Kon gives us another strong female protagonist, and in this case, a superhero as well. The character known as Paprika exists to help people deal with their desires and guides them to think outside of archetypal roles. In this way she comes to represent the concept of the "woman of your dreams,"and in the sense of a super hero, she seems to be perfect. However, Paprika and her real life counterpart, Dr. Chiba, struggle with a Clark Kent/Superman relationship throughout the film. Paprika is everything Chiba isn't, which includes being in full control of her life. By the end, Chiba faces this, and the chief issues of film--which also includes many archetypes, such as technology vs. nature--are resolved by the creation of a new order, where the male archetype of aggression and dominance is defeated by the female archetype of growth and peace. Or to speak in other elements, light conquered shadow by consuming it.

There is one disturbing scene that needs to be addressed. Not to spoil too much, but at one point Paprika is captured and is symbolically raped. A colleague tears off her Paprika form and reveals her true identity beneath. Personally, I'm weary of rape scenes, and feel that popular entertainment is too quick to feature it, often without giving thought to the consequences. This was far from my favorite scene in the movie, but I feel the key word is that it is symbolic. By having the act be represented by something else, it leaves the action in the realm of thought, and forces us to think about rape. I'm not saying that this is any less powerful, or less potentially offensive and dangerous. I just feel in this context that the scene was meant for us to look at rape as a tool of the male aggressive, violent, and controlling mind set. It was not glorified or glamorized, but rather focused on the thought behind the act. The character responsible for the act pins Paprika like a butterfly in a room full of pinned butterflies. This speaks of the "male" desire to control and tame, and how patriarchy places women on the same level as an inset, or an animal that is easily manipulated and controlled. He does not think of her as human but as an object that should be displayed. The archetypal male mind set is further explored when Paprika is rescued by another colleague that is in the process of dreaming about being a male action hero. To him, Paprika is a precious commodity that needs his protection. His view of her is still in the same vein as the rapist's--she is still an object, the two men just disagree on her use. His parody is complete when he take Paprika to the ending scene of his dream that is complete with him posing before the setting sun, as he, the quintessential hero, cradles her in one arm and a smoking gun in the other. He then proceeds to claim his prize by kissing her as she droops unconsciously. This was received by a "how dare you" slap on the face, and the scene ends. After this interlude, Paprika reclaims the movie. Overall, it was a scene that I would have been happier without, no one likes to see a superhero, specifically female superheros, debased in such a way. However, I also don't think the scene was there for shock value or as a form of punishment, which are some of the reasons why rape scenes are told in popular entertainment. Rather, I feel it's purpose was as a tool of discussion. The way that it was produced confirms that. It forces us to confront the mind set that causes rape, and that is one of the first steps in preventing rape.

Whaddya mean there’s no She-Hulk?

2007-06-11T08:27:00.000-07:00

Thanks to a close friend, I managed to play through some of the Xbox 360 version of Marvel Ultimate Alliance. We had fun—some of the best parts were smashing our way through and listening to the throaty calls of the Hulk: “Hulk always wins!”

I was petty happy with the variety of characters—the most comical team that we put together consisted of Venom, The Thing, Hulk, and Ms. Marvel. But I do have some nitpicks:

--First of all, why were the starter characters specifically chosen? I understand the need to keep the pool small in the beginning as there is a slight learning curve, but I still think they could have given some leeway. I really wasn’t feeling it with the Thor, Spidey, Captain America and Wolverine team up.

--I’ve said this before with X-Men Legends II and I’m saying it again. I think there could be more female characters. I don’t see why there can’t be some gender parity. Moon Knight is in there, but no She-Hulk? Raven, you break my heart. (We have history.) With characters such as the ones I mentioned above, it’s not like they’re hurting for some character recognition. And I say this because it’s often argued that women characters are not used because they’re not as well known by the general public.

--That said, I think it would be fun to have some more B-List and obscure characters. Perhaps as unlockables?

--The storyline, though specifically different from X-Men Legends II, felt exactly like X-Men Legends II. I enjoyed the first X-Men Legends because it focused on a specific character; it didn’t feel too large or generic.

--The character animations are still awkward, and this same problem has plagued this franchise since the beginning. Though small, and not integral to the overall enjoyment factor of the game, I thought it’d be addressed, seeing that I was playing this on a 360.

--Last but not least, for whatever reason, I had trouble distinguishing between friend and foe while fighting. I might need to sit closer to the TV screen.

MiPOesias: The David Trinidad Issue #2

2007-06-05T06:41:00.000-07:00

For those of you interested, MiPOesias, an online literary magazine, has published some of my poems. For you geeks out there, two of the three published poems consider super heroics, identity and feminism.

A Response to Virtual Rape in Games

2007-05-31T17:58:00.000-07:00

A couple of weeks back I came across a post from Bonnie over at Heroine Sheik. Bonnie’s great—she writes intriguing feminist articles about video games and is all about promoting acceptance and tolerance for all things sexy, wacky and weird. Yet I just couldn’t get on board with this post.

An excerpt:

It’s an interesting debate, especially since we don’t often run across games that let us rape (exceptions that come to mind include Sociolotron and Custer’s Revenge) and since we were just talking about virtual rape (raping another player, as opposed to a character). Still, drawing a link between game rape and real-life rape is like drawing a link between game violence and real-life violence, and we all know how we feel about that. Thumbs down.

I do understand where she’s coming from—we brandish swords, guns and fists, strategize war tatics and take down the bad guys in virtual worlds, yet these actions don’t translate to real and everyday life. We’re not going to beat up our boss or take out the President in the name of social justice. And I’m never going to say that the guy down the street playing H-games will someday rape. But there’s something about virtual rape that I don’t think can be shoved aside for the sake of fantasy. Virtual rape games are a symptom of our society, where women are systematically devalued and rape isn’t about sex but about power and privilege.

BetaCandy writes about some of the issues that come from rape in fictional settings in her post Inherent problems in writing rape storylines:

With rape, however, we don't have a cultural consensus that "forced sex" is always wrong. A lot of people don't fully comprehend what constitutes rape or consent. A lot of people still think it can't be rape if the rapist is known to the victim. A lot of people still think women can owe men sex, and men are entitled to take the sex they've earned if it's not forthcoming. And they apply this thinking in their daily lives. To women they know. To victims when they serve on juries (or as judges). To themselves, when they internalize the blame for violations others visited upon them.

To just say that virtual rape in hentai games is sexual fantasy in pixilated form is to ignore a whole heap of troublesome and problematic issues. Rape in H-games is not real rape, but it is representative of our misogynistic culture that hurts real live women everyday.

Giant Play

2007-05-29T09:55:00.000-07:00

Throughout my game culture class I wanted to focus on different ways I could prove that video games were an art form. It was the underlying theme behind all of my work. For my the other part in my final paper, I wanted to look at the choices made within Shadow of the Colossus. I only focused on two terms from class, but i want to look further into this game.

The Use of Ludus and Paida Play (in Shadow of the Colossus)

The narration of Shadow of the Colossus is told not only through traditional cut scenes, but through elements of game play as well. Video games have a unique ability to place the audience in the role of the "actor". Within Shadow of the Colossus, the player participates with the unfolding of the narrative. In order to successfully convey the story and themes of the narration, the game considers the different ways that people play video games. Shadow of the Colossus so fully incorporates the main theme of "respect for nature" that regardless of the person in control of the game, the story is revealed. Bernard Perron defines the difference between "player" and "gamer" in his article From Gamers to Players and Gameplayers. Players participate in Ludus play, or rule bound linear play, while gamers participate in paidia play or free play.

Anyone can be a gamer or a player at anytime while playing a game. To compensate for this, Shadow of the Colossus integrates elements of both within its main theme. The world of Shadow of the Colossus is vast and regardless of how much time a person spends outside of the main quest, the design of the world reflects the main theme. There are many distinctive areas to explore that are heavily detailed and full of rewards. An example are the white tailed lizards and fruit that increase both grip and health gauges respectively. The player's bond with the horse, Agro, can also grow by riding, petting, and playing with her. This environment is ideal for paidia/sandbox play. A player can explore nature on their own and discover its beauty, rewards, and friendships. In this way, it is possible for a person to learn of nature's value through simulation.

Ludus play of the game yields a slightly different result. As you actively kill the massive Colossi with only a sword and bow, the fragility of nature becomes apparent. It shows how the simulated world that you fell in love with in paidia play, can be easily torn apart by your actions. The main game endows respect by displaying the results of nature’s destruction. It warns of the dangers of destroying nature for one’s own purposes by showcasing the pain felt by the wanderer, Agro, and the world itself. The game therefore, uses both play styles as different chapters of the narrative. The narrative requires both ludus and paidia play to be fully realized, which is uncommon in videos games, but the ultimate message of the game is obtainable through either.

Portable Playing

2007-05-25T08:07:00.000-07:00

I’m once again addicted to my DS, though for awhile it was collecting an admirable amount of dust. Over the winter, I had bought a copy of Contact, but became frustrated with the game after infiltrating the military complex and put it down. (Can I just complain about my HP dropping when fighting weaker enemies? How the heck can this game just not let you build up?) When I came down with a bad case of cabin fever, I started playing some long neglected Animal Crossing: Wild World, but stopped after the Acorn Festival. (I think some unconscious goal was realized.)

So my DS sat, ignored, until one fateful day I went to Gamestop and grabbed a used copy of Phoenix Wright: Justice for All. And then a week later, on an auspicious and bright day, I was given the gift of Osu! Tatakae! Ouendan.

I know I don’t need to go into great detail with both these games, because I the general consensus is that they’re both awesome. I don’t mind that Phoenix Wright is text-heavy, and though at times I don’t quite follow the logic as the case--some stuff seems to come out of left field--I enjoy the mystery, leg work and trials. Much better than Law & Order.

I knew I wouldn’t be able to stand the music selection of Elite Beat Agents, yet I still wanted to play it. Therefore, for the longest time I pined after Ouendan, not being able to justify the price of importing it. (I saw copies of it in Japan when I was there last summer, but wasn’t able to find any good deals.) I don’t know if I’m driving my roommates crazy, but I’m addicted. It’s hilarious, catchy, and original.

I still have plans for my DS after I finish off these two. A copy of Pokemon Diamond or Pearl will be mine, not to mention that I have my eye on Hotel Dusk and Lunar Knights.

Metal Heart

2007-05-24T11:23:00.000-07:00

I would like to admitt something to the internet: I love Metal Gear. I've recently accepted my feelings towards it after a long period of denial. It's not perfect, but who is right? Like the Metal Gears themselves, the series has its share of weak points, or as Otacon puts it, "character flaws." Yet I stil find great value and artistry within it as a whole. This love was reaffirmed by my Game Culture class. For my final assignment, I looked at James Gee's concept of cultural models within Metal Gear Solid 3. Gee's book, What Video Games Have to Teach Us About Learning and Literacy was the primary text for my class and was very insightful. One part that really stuck out to me was his Cultural Models, otherwise known as the ideas that a game operates around. It is what the game presents as normal or right and its message and concept of the world. This struck a cord with me because I feel that he described what this blog examines, along with much of the feminist writings on pop culture. What do games tell us? Is a game producing the model that women are mere sexual objects (DOA), or is it telling us how gender does not effect ability, skill, or heroism (Metriod Prime)?

Since I have not played through the Metal Gear series in a while, I wanted to replay them and fully look at what these games are telling us. I feel that it provides a far more productive message than what most triple A titles being produced at this time offer, but we'll see. Here is the section of my final paper dealing with MGS3. The orginal plan for the assignment was to post it on Wikipedia, but that proved too difficult, so I figure this blog was just as good. ;)

Cultural Models (in Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater)

James Paul Gee’s concept of cultural models (the different hypothesises that humans form on what is normal or typical) can be examined within Metal Gear Solid 3. The game presents with its gameplay and narration cultural models of war that is unique when compared to most video games. Snake Eater provides motivation for the player to strive for peace within a seemingly violent game. The main element of gameplay is stealth, or what can be seen as the avoidance of conflict. The main goal of the game is to proceed from one area to the next without getting caught. You do not have to kill any of the guards in order to “win.” The game only provides for you a non-lethal tranquilizer gun, and Close Quarters Combat abilities (CQC). You have to seek out the lethal weapons yourself. Also, every enemy can be defeated by non-lethal means, and when CQC is deployed, it is just as simple to incapacitate the enemy, as it is to kill them. So essentially it is your choice to kill or not. A cultural model that violence is never a necessity is presented by giving the player the autonomy over the level of violence within their actions. The model states that violence is an option that people actively choose.

The game goes further to actually reward the player for not taking the most violent option. If bosses are defeated with the tranquilizer gun, the player unlocks special camouflage items that can not be acquired anywhere else in the game. There are also more consequences when a dead guard is discovered compared to when a sleeping guard is discovered. Defeating the bosses without lethal weapons is no easy task, and if guards are incapacitated rather than killed, they will become an obstacle again as soon as they wake up. Therefore, using non-lethal methods adds more difficulty. This presents the cultural model that violence is not the easier option, but peace will garner greater rewards.

The strongest example of the game’s peaceful intentions is the finally battle with The Boss. She is the only person the player is required to kill. The game forces you to press the button that causes Snake to shoot her. There is no other option that will finish the game. Afterwards, the story clearly maps out the effects of her death on Snake and his world. The consequences of the violence are fully explored thereby presenting the cultural model that violence will bring pain, and has an extensive impact on people. Therefore the player may look back on the different acts of violence they might have been committing throughout the game, and see them in a new light.

Reminder for Upcoming Carnivals

2007-05-23T07:36:00.000-07:00

The 14th Carnival of Feminist Science Fiction and Fantasy Fans will be hosted by Heroine Content on May 30th. The deadline for submissions is May 27th! Please submit via email to skyekilaen[at]gmail[dot]com. They are looking for posts, web comics, and art with a feminist perspective on science fiction and fantasy. This can include TV, Movies, Books, Comics, Games, etc. For more information, see the Guidelines.

Make sure to check out the new People of Colour SF Carnival. The first edition is scheduled for June 15th. See their site for more details.

50 Things I Love About Video Games

2007-05-18T06:55:00.000-07:00

I'm swiping this from kalinara:

It's been argued before and it'll undoubtedly be argued again, that girls don't read superhero comics. [...] I don't think it should surprise anyone that I disagree with this wholeheartedly. Instead of going on a long, angry rant explaining why, I figured I'd explain what I, a girl and a feminist, personally love about superhero comics.

Her list is wonderful. If you also love comics, you should read the whole list.

In all corners of geek culture, there's a lot of animosity towards women. It can get difficult at times to remember why I'm fighting so hard--I mean, if so much pisses me off about video games and video game culture, isn't it a bit masochistic to be going off about it all the time? When I read kalinara's list, I instantly knew that I had to do one for myself, so that I can reclaim some of my love for gaming. Without further ado, 50 things that I love about video games:

1. Puzzles that hurt my brain
2. Nostalgia
3. Soap operas in outer space
4. Beating stuff up
5. Magic & melee
6. Farming sims for the city girl
7. Playing Wii Sports with the parents
8. Making Miis that resemble pets
9. Brother/sister rivalry
10. Significant other rivalry
11. Raising Pokemon
12. Combos
13. Zombie dogs scare the crap out of me
14. Kirby is damn cute
15. Character customization
16. Old gaming consoles aka I still love the Sega CD
17. Dungeon crawling with a friend
18. Entertainment during unemployment
19. Staying up until 3 am just to beat Baten Kaitos, only to have to work at 8 the next day
20. Sneaking in some DS during work (bathroom stalls: ftw)
21. Voice acting: good and awful
22. Rhythm games and J-Pop
23. Epic boss bottles
24. Falling asleep while leveling
25. Androgynous men
26. Strong women
27. Cyborgs and robots
28. Partaking in a feedback loop
29. Sad endings
30. Cell-shaded graphics
31. Sprites
32. Mario mushrooms
33. Sega vs Nintendo vs Microsoft vs Sony
34. Being a doctor, lawyer, mercenary
35. Item management
36. Seeking out every single piece of hidden treasure
37. Bonding with a frienemy after beating a game together
38. Jade
39. The original versions of Lunar and Lunar 2
40. Pikmin
41. Swords
42. Umbrellas as weapons
43. Dynasty/Samurai Warriors will always be the same
44. Leon styled after a French underwear model
45. Thumb cramp
46. Plot twists
47. Tales of, Dragon Quest, Xeno
48. “Don't get cocky, cause it's gonna get rocky”
49. Hold on, just one more level…
50. Saving the world

Crap. Now how am I going to get my Mystery of the Week?

2007-05-17T12:24:00.000-07:00

It's true. They canned Veronica Mars.

My introduction to Veronica Mars was in December. Freshly graduated, depressed and dog sitting, I popped in the first DVD from the first season and was hooked. Sure, the show is far from perfect, but I have a soft spot for detective stories and plucky female leads. Heck, it was good enough for me to start watching it every Tuesday night, taking away from valuable gaming/internet/anime time. This third season has been pretty disappointing, but I had a lot of hope that it was going to get better again.

From the Blog Feed

2007-05-16T13:24:00.000-07:00

Video games
Streets of Rage Review My brother and I became friends when we first played this game.
Critiquing video games: let's not get ahead of ourselves I'd say some game story lines are pretty damned developed. And games that have under developed stories still have much to offer in terms of criticism.
Joseph Saulter: 'Why should I have to be a white man?'

Saulter says the industry is like a "horse with blinders" on when it comes to issues of diversity. It's not that they are outright ignoring minorities, it's just that the focus is so straight ahead and narrow, companies don't take the time to reach out.

Anti-Oppression
On being an ally

Allies have a very different place in anti-oppression work than members of the
non-privileged group.

Comics
Last Refuges of Scoundrels

Health Care
Why We Don't Have National Health Insurance Having insurance would help solve some of my big problems right now.

Food
$21.07, Speckled Akara Yum!

Silent Hill: Simulation of Cruelty - Part 3: The Final Act: Gamplay as Pure, Primal and Divine

2007-05-15T10:31:00.000-07:00

Previously: Part 1, Part 2

As anyone who has played through a Silent Hill game will tell you, the endings aren't the most satisfying. They all basically say, "The game is over." The inclusion of multiple endings and the joke alien endings further confirm that the ending cinema is just presenting a new status quo, and that this new status quo is not very important to the over all message of the game. The game's narrative qualities should not be judged based on the ending alone. The (rotten) meat of the game is gameplay, and the story surrounding that gameplay. Heather's search for identity in Silent Hill 3, Henry's struggle for freedom in Silent Hill 4, and James' need for love in Silent Hill 2 all are active while the player is active. When the game is over and the final boss is killed, the game can no longer express anything to the player. Although the action leads to an eventual end, the journey is what is important in discerning theme and meaning. The literature of the game should be taken more as a drama and not like a novel.

The player benefits in playing a game with a heightened sense of immersion, arguably greater than theater can accomplish. The player gets to partake in a simulation of cruelty. With the tools given by the developers, a person is able to experience the emotions of the character first hand. Heather's fear, anger, and disgust of who she is can be translated directly to the player through the gameplay. The game is crafted in a manner so the actions and elements within it will replicate the pain of the character. On top of this, Silent Hill destroys the psychology of emotion, and takes it to the pure, primal, and divine.

The structure of the game forces a player to act within their primal nature. The key objective of Silent Hill is survival. The player is constantly put in a position of fight or flight. The limited health and accuracy of the control makes staying to fight a difficult option. Fleeing is also hampered by tight hallways, fast enemies, and a difficult control scheme. The objects you gain while playing are crucial to your survival. There is no collection of coins or rings for bonus points like in other games.
The actions themselves are also of a more primal nature for most of the game is spent using simple melee weapons, like a rusty pipe. Bullets are rare, and are not necessary in defeating the monsters. The action of physically beating something to death with a simple tool conjures images and feelings of base instincts—it is also undoubtedly you that is doing the killing., it is your force, your muscle. This deepens the immersion for the player, for they can not distance themselves from the violence with a gun. If a gun is used, however, a physical element is still placed in. Once an enemy reaches low health, it falls to the ground and cries out and convulses in death throes. In order to finish it off, the player must crush it with their foot. This violence is more intense than in most games. It is clear that you are killing something that is living, something that bleeds, and will remain after it is dead. The monsters are not mere targets to get points, and defeating them is not a way to show off how skilled a player you are. They are undefined living creatures that you have to kill to survive. Accentuating the violence draws your attention to it. You cannot overlook the bleeding stump with legs on it, or a nurse with no face as it writhes on the floor. This is exactly the type of image and act that Artaud calls for: a pure act of violence that forces you to focus on the thought behind it.

The breakdown of psychology furthers the player’s ascension. What you are killing is never explained. The horrific surrounding are never defined either. Attempts are made through the game, but are always ambiguous. At one point, Heather is horrified to find out that the things she sees as monsters might actually be people. The hell worlds that the characters fall in and out of are never defined as either a real space or something their minds create. The games are abstract, and they induce fear. This abstraction releases the player from culture and brings them into a space within themselves. They have to define for themselves the pulsing and glowing red hallway, or a table with bloody sheets that runs like a dog. That definition will be based in an emotional response, rather than what is in their day to day lives. The player's mind is therefore beyond the physical world, and through this they can reach the divine.

The Silent Hill series has borrowed many conventions of survival horror games that were established by Resident Evil. However, the ultimate goals behind the two are completely different. Resident Evil takes conventions from action and horror movies. Silent Hill's horrors hold more meaning than quick fun shocks and gross outs. There is substance in its images and these are connected to either the character's struggle or the overall themes of the game. For instance, the overarching story of Silent Hill always holds a religious element to it. Whether you are fighting a cult, being chosen to give birth to God, or tying to stop the 21 Sacraments, Silent Hill has forced players to explore that of which is not of our world. It surrounds the gamer with violence: from puzzles that give a description of a killer eating a face so that you can figure the code of the number pad in order to open a door, to carrying items that are as gruesome, like a plastic bag you filled with blood from the cut throat of a hanging corpse. In this world of violence a person is forced to leave their everyday lives, and in their work to survive, they are raised to a pure primal state like the one Artaud describes. Perhaps when they leave the space of the game, the player will have a greater understanding of the meaning of violence, so that they will never side with it.

Silent Hill: Simulation of Cruelty – Part 2: A Link to the Divine

2007-05-14T12:05:00.000-07:00

Previously: Silent Hill: Simulation of Cruelty – Part 1: An Introduction to Theatre of Cruelty

Can a game capture the primal force that Artaud speaks of? Artaud was very specific in the fact that only theater could achieve this. It might not be possible, but compared to theater, it can be said that video games are the closest medium for this to be achieved in, and the Silent Hill games are the closest representation of that possibility. The main connection between the two is Artaud's concept of gesture. Games are the only other art form, that when played, will never be the same twice because no matter how many times you play through a game, the moment to moment actions are based on human reaction and thought. It can be as simple as the way in which the main character walks down a hallway. In a movie or novel, the main character will always walk down the hall in the same way, but this rigidity does not exist in games. There is the chance for creation based on the individual player. The power of gesture was very important to Artaud. The fluidity of theater can capture life. Video games can capture that fluidity, and take it further.

In Theater of Cruelty, the actor takes the role of a shaman for the audience. The actor is the audience's link to the divine. In video games you are the actor, because the game will not move forward unless the player takes action. Video games therefore place the user in a distinctive position: they are both part of the story and the audience. It is their action that will make the game unique through every movement, giving a more natural flow to the art, pulling it closer to the divine. The question becomes: is the player the shaman or the avatar? I don't feel that the player has enough freedom to remove themselves from the place of audience. There are some games that give the player freedom that make him or her the storyteller, but in Silent Hill the actions that you can partake in are limited and specific. You can only use predetermined objects, follow the story in a set course of events, and although the camera is adjustable, you can only see what is within its range of movements. Therefore, the creators crafted a specific experience that a player can have--which forces the player to act in the way they want--but the player is still given enough freedom so that actions can be slightly different every time they are performed. In this sense the avatar is the shaman to the player. The lack of freedom to zoom the camera up to a bird's eye view, or pick up any object onscreen limits the responsibility of the player to tell the relatively linear story. The choice of this story element was already selected for the player. Such as when an obstacle arises, like having to beat screaming, bleeding carousel horses until they die, the player will interpret this as an event in the character's (in this case, Heather, from Silent Hill 3) journey. In this way the user is just unveiling the story. The game is therefore created to have an effect on the player, not the other way around. This ultimately places the player in a position to be freed from their everyday life so that they can rise to a higher plain.

Next: Taking it a step further: immersion and cruelty.

Silent Hill: Simulation of Cruelty - Part 1: An Introduction to Theatre of Cruelty

2007-05-11T07:48:00.000-07:00

Horror games have been a top selling genre of video games for over a decade. They have taught us the value of conserving ammo in a zombie outbreak, and to always leave room in your inventory for the unexpected health item or bloody rusty key. One survival horror game series, however, has tried to teach us more. The Silent Hill series has consistently pushed its players beyond normal shock and excitement. The series uses horror as a tool for an expression of an idea, instead of just thrilling its audience. In this sense, Silent Hill moves into the realm of art. Art feeds from artistic ideas of the past, and video games are no different. The Silent Hill games are an extension of the concepts found in Antonin Artaud's Theater of Cruelty, for the ultimate goal of the games is to lift the player out of reality to a place of primal forces.

Artaud developed his Theater of Cruelty in the 1930's in response to art and the declining soul of humanity. He believed that art had lost its purpose in society—that it should not be a part of any high culture, but rather used as a means for "the world of the gods" to enter in us. Totemism inspired him to look at art as a way to release forces that hasten communication with the divine. In ancient cultures, performances done by shaman were used to entrance the viewer and take them to a higher plane. He felt that the loss of these rituals in society caused great pain and destruction. To Artaud, theater could save humanity because it is "capable of recovering within ourselves those energies which ultimately create order and increase the value of life." Theater is not confined to any one language because it is based on live actions, or as he puts it, "gesture." The gesture of theater can "reverb" in a person, which allows him or her to take the attitudes behind the gesture within themselves. Each performance is unique, which allows it to recreate the natural rhythms of life, in any circumstance.

Theater of Cruelty was created so that the brutality of the world could be shown to us, so that we can see that the sky can fall. He felt that violent images gave a person the sense of the supernatural which would therefore raise us out of our culture. Take, for example, walking on the street with a group of people, and then suddenly witnessing a child getting hit by a bus. In the initial moment everyone in the group would be lifted out of their culture and everyday life, and taken to a primal place. The violent images in Theatre of Cruelty focus on the violent thought behind the act. To emphasize this: the thought and not the act will show violence's true nature, making it impossible for the audience to embrace violence or war. The thought behind the violence will be seen as useless and can therefore redirect humanity to peace.

Next: How the Silent Hill series fits in with all of this.

Invitation Only

2007-05-10T08:46:00.000-07:00

Ever since its launch on the web, Iris Gaming Network and its in-house magazine Cerise have been charged as being separatist spaces for women gamers. What Iris actually aims for is an inclusive space. However, I want to take this opportunity to discuss some of the theory behind separatism and some of the benefits that can come from it.

To take it right from Wikipedia:

Separatism in a feminist context “suggests that the political disparities between men and women cannot be readily resolved, and encourages women to direct their energies toward other women rather than men."

Meaning that trying to solve the issues between men and women that are caused by the patriarchy is futile. Women building a support group for other women is time better spent.

Karen Mudd, writing for Off Our Backs describes separatism in the eyes of Marilyn Frye as

“various sorts or modes from men and from institutions, relationships, roles and
activities which are maledefined, male-dominated and operating for the benefit
of males and the maintenance of male privilege -- this separation [is] being
initiated or maintained, at will, by women.”

Because of patriarchy, everything in our culture privileges certain traits, that of white, straight, able, upper class men. If you do not possess these norms, you are excluded or suffer in some sort of way. Creating one’s own group effectively changes the norms and privileges of the culture that you create.

Mudd also nods to Bette Tallen, a feminist political scientist, who defines the differences between

“segregation and separatism-- the former being imposed by the dominant class,
the latter being self-imposed.” Mud goes on to say, that Tallen believed,
as a supporter of separatism, that “integration and assimilation are
synonymous.”

Tallen views separatism as an active choice that fully rejects dominate social structures.

In gaming culture I’ve learned that I’m damned if I do, and damned if I don’t. Rather, if I want to be seen or respected as a gamer and as a woman, I get in trouble, as in getting harassed. Yet, if I keep quiet, I get to internalize and ingest stacks of sexism (with heaping sides of racism and homophobia.)

However, if you split off into your own separate and safe space, the dominant group is still incensed. What’s going on here?

I see separatism as something that spits in the eye of patriarchy. There’s safety and revolution in numbers. When a group of people split off, they’re essentially saying that they’re rejecting the way things are. They want to create their own place with their own rules, because way things are isn’t working. Within this group, members are able to organize, solve issues, and work towards solidarity. They are powerful rather than powerless. Ideally, after some time, the group might decide to mingle with the dominate culture again, or they may not.

I realize that what I just wrote is all hypothetical. A separatist group can be successful or fail, like any other project. Also, while I do see the value in separatism, I think it has its limits. I want to take part in dominate culture. I want to be recognized, I want to have a say. I believe, essentially, that over time and with a lot of work, that it can change. That’s why I love the idea and work of Iris. Groups that focus on inclusiveness, like Iris, provide a safe space while working towards evolving dominant culture.

Requisite Backlash

2007-05-08T09:26:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Kotaku linked to Cerise, and predictably, hostility in the comments section ensued. Check out these related and brilliant blog posts that discuss gaming communities and women:

Harassment, silencing, and gaming communities
On women-oriented gaming communities
Kotaku Commenters Prove the Necessity of a Women's Gaming Magazine

There are many issues I’d like to address that I found while wading through the comments. Some would be separatism vs. integration, using the word misogyny instead of sexism, internalized sexism, and the idea that feminist gamers are sexist i.e. anti-male and anti-female.

However, what I want to focus on today is the idea that women gamers shouldn’t have their own outlet (or magazine such as Cerise) because their numbers don’t equal that of men who game. The actual demographics of people of video games can reveal a lot about the current climate of the video game industry and culture. So who has the controller? Brace yourself for some stats.

Justine Cassell and Henry Jenkins wrote in their essay “Chess for Girls? Feminism and Computer Games” that in 1999, around 35 million homes in the United States owned one video game console, which is about 30-40% of American homes. In addition to this, 10-20% of homes rented consoles or shared with their neighbors. According to the Entertainment Software Association’s 2006 Sales, Demographic and Usage Data, 69% of American heads of households play computer or video games, the average game player’s age is 33, and 38% of percent of gamers are women. In fact, gamers consist more of women that are 18 years or older (30%) than that of boys who are 17 years or younger (23%), and according to Nielsen, women make up 64% of online gamers.

When we think of the typical gamer--and this includes the commenters over at Kotaku--a white, pimpled, horny teen boy is usually called to mind, yet the stats indicate that the gaming community is more diverse. The stats regarding women gamers, especially those that reveal that there are more adult women gamers than of teenage boys, challenges our stereotypical image of a gamer.

I’m sharing these stats because I want to reiterate that there are more female gamers out there than is usually acknowledged. However, even if we don’t outnumber men, it doesn’t mean our viewpoints are less valid. We’re a demographic and that’s enough. Besides, our ranks are growing. There’s a group of us that think the culture of our hobby could be better, and we aim to make our voices heard.

ETA:
More reasons for a magazine for gaming women
Zach proves why nobody doesn't like Molten Boron
"STFU and GTFO"

Depression and Art

2007-05-07T07:08:00.000-07:00

I’ve been enjoying Planet Karen for quite awhile now and this comic was no exception:

In fact, this comic really affected me, for a lot of reasons.

I felt prompted to say something, so I clicked over to the Girl-wonder.org boards and wrote

Today's comic is heart wrenchingly beautiful. I'm going through something
similar right now. Depression is simply awful.

And Betty hit it all right on the head:

I'm really impressed that you could use that to make a comic, Karen. When I'm
like that it's usually a battle to brush my teeth. I really appreciate that you
don't flinch back from talking about mental health. I think it's a bit of a
taboo, which doesn't really help you when you're already feeling like you're
alone and isolated.

Depression is hard to discuss, and is even more difficult to capture in art. There are not enough heartfelt attempts out there, and god knows I can’t write about it. Depression is even more difficult to respond to. I was taken aback by some of the other comments in the forum that “there’s nothing beautiful about depression” (I understand the sentiment, but who was saying that it is?) and that all that depressed folks need to do is to add some omega-3 to their diets. As though, for many of us, we haven’t tried everything imaginable: drastic diet changes, yoga, St. John’s Wort, anti-depressants, therapy. I’m not saying that any of those options aren’t helpful--they are. It’s just that treating depression is a process; there’s no quick fix available. Suffering from it is hard enough, but it’s exacerbated because depression is taboo, and too often those who haven’t or aren’t dealing with it make flippant (though well meaning) comments that add insult to injury.

We need more people to unflinchingly address this issue. We need people like Karen.

Check Out Cerise #1

2007-05-01T17:47:00.000-07:00

I've always wanted there to be a feminist gaming zine and now there is one. The first issue of Cerise is up today. The editors have done a terrific job putting it together, so make sure you take some time to check it out.

I'm also pleased to say that an article of mine is published in this issue--it appears alongside some other great pieces that look at how gender and games intersect.

Reuters Ignores Women Gamers, Plus Geek Girl Stereotype Bingo

2007-04-16T20:44:00.000-07:00

In a piece of enlightened journalism, Reuters blames video game accessories for strained romantic relationships between men and women. The article, as is expected, thoroughly stereotypes women and their relationships with gamer guys. At least Brenda Brathwaite is featured in the second half of the article--for the sake of balance I suppose. However, it isn't enough to shake the heterosexual-infused, women-are-weary-of-video-games attitude of the article. Therefore, I've decided that this article could benefit from a treatment of tekanji's "Geek Girl" Stereotype Bingo:

Relationships mentioned as being important to women: This is the main point of the article. As the first sentence says, "enter the video game accessory as date killer".

Mentions shopping or accessories: Yep. The equivalent to video games and accessories are... shoes.

"Social" as being attractive to women: The end of the article speaks to double dates and games. Also games can "serve as a his-and-hers social elixir."

Women are seen as "casual" / non-serious users: I would argue that the description of Guitar Hero as a game that "encourages friends to duel against each other as spectators cheer them on" and therefore women enjoy it, is an attempt to make it seem casual.

Let's see, 4 out of 9 squares. I say we have a bingo.

Via Joystiq.

The Second Half of My Adventures with a Purple Prophecy

2007-04-12T19:18:00.000-07:00

As promised, the second half of my impressions of Indigo Prophecy:

III. Game Play Issues

I feel I’m pretty close to beating the game. I got that things are wrapping up feeling from the tone of the story. With all my other work, I haven’t spent too much time with it, so I’m a little surprised. The formula is still keeping me interested, although I have to complain about the lame “action” scenes. All that they consist of is moving the analogue sticks in the right directions in the right order, a la Simon Says. At first I didn’t mind so much, but after the twentieth time I’ve done this now, it’s getting a little flat. The actions totally remove me from the experience. It feels tacked on, like the developers thought they had to have the players do something during the cut scenes. What has happened is that I can barely focus on the over the top action at all. I’m to worried about what direction the light is flashing. Though maybe it’s for the best, because the action scenes go on for way to long and the content of them just seems so out of place. Why does he need superpowers? Is that really how you validate your “movie game,” cloning the Matrix? My hopes for the game to be more mystery than action movie are fading fast. I guess I just have to wait to see how it all turns out.

IV. The Ending, Rife with Spoilers

Indigo Prophecy has easily the worst ending to a video game that I have ever played. The extent of the failure was accentuated by my enjoyment of the game up until my last post. The ending however was so terrible, it makes me question any positive feelings I have for the game. The first element of the game that fell through was the narrative. It became incohesive and introduced bizarre plot twists. The plot twists included, but were not limited to, a race of AI beings that existed on the internet that were trying to kill you. The whole superpower and sci-fi thing was getting out of hand, but by the end it overshadowed any interesting character developments that were formed previously. The end opted to focus on uncontrollable action scenes to finish out the story, instead of offering any real resolutions to the problems of the characters. The writer obviously did not go into this game with any real message, philosophy, or social plight he wanted to reveal or discuss. I wouldn’t mind this in Street Fighter, but in a game that was meant to redefine video game narratives it’s pretty sad. I just wonder why he didn’t just make a traditional action game. The fantastical elements seemed to be a gimmick, and reminded me of the reading that discussed immersion. The extent of the fantasy seemed out of place in the world that was presented through most of the game. At least, the parts that were more real world were much more interesting, so I identified with them. I felt alienated when the game shifted away from the detective story formula that I had grown attached to.

The worst part of the ending was the complete destruction of my favorite character in the game. Carla, the detective who was chasing Lucas, underwent a character shift that had no basis in what was previously understood about her character. As the world is being covered in an ice age, (which is never fully explained) she decides to sleep with the DEAD version of Lucas. Lucas died, and the AI internet people brought him back to life, but his body was still technically dead. Carla made multiple references about how cold his skin was, as if he was dead. Then she sleeps with him, and falls in love with him with no real motivation other than the fact that he is the main character of the game that I’m playing. This act does not match the character that was presented before hand. There was nothing suggesting her feelings for Lucas. Carla abandons her job and playability in the game as soon as she finds the right man to hide behind. She is demoted to nothing more than the love interest. The ending movie pushes her farther down the respectable character ladder by making her ultimate purpose in the grand scheme to give birth to Lucus’ super baby. No matter what ending you get, Carla is pregnant. This interesting, well developed character was turned into nothing more than a womb.

My Adventures With a Purple Prophecy

2007-04-11T19:16:00.000-07:00

In order to breathe some life back into this blog, I thought I'd put up some posts that I wrote up for my Games and Culture class. Before I jump in I want to give a nod to some other blog posts out there that do a great job looking at Indigo Prophecy: Pat Miller's Indigo Prophecy Reinforces White Male Supremacy Part 1 and Part 2, and tekanji's Introduction [Gender in Indigo Prophecy Part 1] and What's in a character, anyway? [Gender in Indigo Prophecy Part 2].
---

I. Beginning Impressions

Indigo Prophecy, why not? I heard interesting things about it, and thought this would be a good opportunity to get me to play it, and experience this so called “movie game.” I must say that this game is pretty full of itself. It loves the fact that it’s “different,” to the extent that the creator not only wrote an editorial in the manual explaining it’s greatness, but put himself into the game. In the tutorial, there is a polygon representation of David Cage the writer and director, explaining the controls, what you can expect, and how you will love it. I can’t think of any other examples of this kind of intrusion into the game space by the developers. It had the feeling of an AMC or Turner Classic Movie introduction, with a old white dude telling you the history and how great this movie your about to watch is. It definitely added a strange kind of validity to the game, but I still think the game is full of itself. I’ve always been of the mind that a piece of art should speak for itself. You don’t need to goad me into liking this game, I will or I won’t. And in all reality, it’s not that different from your standard point and click game on the PC, it’s been done before.

Now the content of the game is pretty original. It seems like I will be playing two sides of a murder story: from both the killer’s perspective (who is kind of innocent), and the police. I really like the set up, and love how I first had to escape the seen of the crime, and then investigate it as the cops. It’s like my loyalties are split, I have to succeed as both opposing forces. It’s really interesting, and makes me care a lot about the characters and what’s going on. I get all the perspectives of the story and then can relate to all the characters. And I just have to say how brilliant it was to start the game with, “you have to cover up your crime and escape.” It really brought the learning curve of the game into part of the experience. I was frantic to clean up the evidence and escape while trying to learn the controls. I was as panicked as the character. We both had no idea what was going on. There were multiple options and methods, and I had to decided which would best help me in the situation. It was a unique emotional experience. Then I got to examine all the actions I chose when I played as the cops. I found the clues that I left before, and question the witnesses that saw me escape. Fun!

II. Representations of Race and Gender

I want to look at how Indigo Prophecy handles representations of race and gender. Out of the three playable characters so far (in order of appearance), one is a white man named Lucas, one is a Latina female detective Carla, and third is her partner, an African American man, Tyler. This list represents the order of playing–Lucas, the white guy, started off the bunch. This fact, along with the box cover, and that the story centers around his initial act of murder, leads me to take him as the main character of the story. However, the time spent playing as him is just as equal to the other two characters. So even though the main character is a pretty typical example of what to find in video games, more time in the game is spent between the two characters of color, one of whom is a woman. The game allows you to chose which character you want to play as during a certain episode in the overall story. You have to play all three eventually, but the player is given the option to chose which view of events they want to see first. Most importantly, each character has been fully developed in their own right. I know just as much about the detectives’ lives, personalities, fears, and loves as I do Lucas. At this point, the game is very egalitarian, and achieves this with very little effort. They just write all the characters as people, and not some stereotype. My favorite part of the game so far has been the ability to walk around the character’s apartments. You really get an insight into their personalities by looking through their stuff, and how it is arranged.

This is also the location of my two snafus that I found in the gender and race department. This one’s up for debate, but Tyler’s apartment really pushed the whole “this character’s black” vibe. His walls were painted like something out of 70’s. The furniture was also all poofy and loud, with a dome chair, furry TV, and a record player. It isn’t terribly damning of the game, but it just didn’t seem to fit with his personality that much, and screamed “black man’s funky apartment” to me. I think it detracted from the great, complex character development, and that it represents the only real indication that the game gave that “this character is black,” besides his skin tone. Compare that to other games (*cough* Gears of War *cough*) that love to remind you at every opportunity possible that a character is black, and therefore must act much differently than white people, Indigo Prophecy does a pretty good for a game.

There was also an instance in which the game reminded everyone that Carla is a woman, and that, yes, women are sex objects, regardless of how good of a detective she may be. The game determined that the best way to do this was put their super cop in the shower. One of her episodes started in the shower and gave a clear view of her nipple-less breasts. Afterwards, the game awarded the male gaze with overly revealing panties and tank top–which you did get to cover up at any time by getting dressed–but regardless you got an eyeful. There were options to take showers as the other two characters, but none of their “private” areas were exposed and the resulting underwear covered much more, and was much more realistic in what those characters would wear. Why would a woman who is obsessed with her job, and has no love life wear sexy undies? Unfortunately, there was no equivalent, no brief bulge, programmed into the game. This incident was quick and the only attempt to make her sexy so far. Though, again, it stood out from a great and complex character, belittling her in a way.

Overall, this games really seems to make an effort in treating all of it’s characters with respect. Despite a few classic instances of the white and male gaze, the game so far allows the player to view life from perspectives not normally given in video games.

---
Tomorrow I'll post the rest of my observations of the game. I'll mainly discuss game play and my thoughts of how the game wrapped up.

The IRIS Network Launches!

2007-03-23T06:43:00.000-07:00

Today marks the day of the official launch of The IRIS Network:

After yet another bout of the “where are all the women gamers?” on the internet
gaming communities, The IRIS Network (TIN) was finally born. Though there are
many individual women gamers who write about their experiences, and many sites
for women who game to connect and play with each other, none of these sites are
there for the express purpose of highlighting gamers (both in the industry and
outside of it) and bringing women’s perspectives into the mainstream. Though it
may be a lofty goal, that’s exactly what we here at The IRIS Network aim to do.

Join or browse the forums, check out the directory of women game bloggers and take a peek at TIN's forthcoming online zine Cerise.

And a note to all the women gamer bloggers out there: feel free to adjust, add info on, post up a logo for your page on the directory. I plan to email everyone personally, but it might take a few days for me to be able to do so.

Now You Know (And Knowing is Half the Battle)

2007-03-13T16:38:00.000-07:00

I'm shocked, so shocked, that Brian Crecente over at Kotaku found little evidence of women writing gamer blogs. It seems to me, as I compile links for Jade Reporting, that new gaming blogs by women are popping up every day. Why, here's a sample:

Acid for Blood
Aktrez
Amateurverbs
Amber Night
BM2 Love Angel
Dr. B's Blog
The Baroness
Dreamy Gamer
Electric Sista Hood
Feminist Gamers
Frag Dolls
Free Candy For Everyone
Game Girl Advance
GameGal.com
GamerFemme
GamingDivas
The Geek Side
Gender & Computing
The Girl Gamer
Girl Gamers (here and here)
Girl Power
Girls Who Like Girls Who Game!
The Guild of Gaming Women
Guilded Lilies
The Hathor Legacy
The Headpiece for the Staff of Ra
Hellbound Angels
Hellchick's Blog
The Heroine Next Door
Heroine Sheik
Home of the Fighting Fangirls
jill/text
Joanna's Academic Adventures
Killer Betties
Laurean's Blog
mer writes about rpgs
New Game Plus
Netwoman
Nintendo Gal
Official Shrub.com Blog
The Play Girlz Gaming Blog
Pulp Arcade
Sex & Games
Still Life With Soup Can
thinking with my fingers
Through the Eyes of a Journalist
Thumb Bandits
TriXie
Venturesome
West Karana
Who doesn't love roses
wickedqueen.net
Womengamers.com
Wonderland
WoW_Ladies

And I know this list isn't even close to being complete. (To any bloggers I've missed, let me know if you want me to add you.)

And make sure you check out tekanji's response to Kotaku over at her blog.

UPDATE: Be sure to check out The IRIS Network's directory of women gamers who blog--it aims to have in one place all of our blogs so that anyone looking for us can find us.

GRAW!

2007-03-06T17:16:00.000-08:00

I don't own a Xbox 360, but lucky I go to a college where the library owns one for me. Between classes on Friday I discovered a hidden gem: a shiny Xbox 360 that was connected to a big screen HDTV. I decided it was time to use my well spent tuition money and booted it up. They had a large selection of two games consisting of Table Tennis and Ghost Recon Advanced Warfighter. I picked Ghost Recon so that I could discuss and examine the "myth" behind the game. I also wanted to look at a phenomenon that occurs regularly in video games: the creation of a well designed and fun game, that features content that boils down to propaganda. Games that sway minds to support the war, and love the patriarchy that exploits women, the poor and the underprivileged. A game that turns war into just a game, completely overlooking war's true nature. I know that as I play this game I'm taking in these messages, but I'm having a blast.

The myth behind the war game's text is that war is an acceptable option. War is clean, swift, and only eliminates those that wish to do harm to the innocent. Specifically, the United States fights wars in this way, and that it has the right to conduct war in any country that we see fit. We bring justice to the world. This has been a part of our culture for generations. The game puts forth this idea through normal game conventions: shoot the enemy, move to the next location and shoot more, reach end of the stage, watch the cut scene congratulating you. The game hooks us in by placing itself in realistic settings that remind us of current world issues, like the war in Iraq. War games have pushed to be more and more realistic; to represent real world conflicts. The game world, however, is a world without consequences. If a team member dies you can revive them with the Y button, and of course you can retry from the nearest save point if you happen to be killed. The enemies are reduced in this game as nothing more that red diamonds which indicate their location in the game screen, and when they die the diamonds turn white. In game play terms this is useful in that it keeps the game easily accessible, but in turn, it completely dehumanizes the NPCs. And speaking of white, the only choice for the main character is a white male, who leads a squad of culturally diverse troops through the battlefield. No big deal if your African American gunner gets killed--you can just revive them, but if the white commander gets shot, it's game over. The enemies are also non-white, and the action takes place in a Mexican-influenced third world country. This defines the myth that America can do what it wants in poor countries.

To get back to a previous point, even after knowing all of this I still have fun with it. Overall, it is a well designed video game, with pretty graphics, interesting situations, and good controls. But herein lies the rub. Too often people play these good games, and get caught up in the game play, not grasping what they are saying to them. It's perfect propaganda: the player gets to have a great time, while imperialism feeds them messages of war. Why would advertisers be making games, and why would the actual army make a game, if it's not a strong form of suggestion? It's the power of simulation. Being able to act out in a simulated environment and make mistakes, to explore and hop into the role of soldier, allows a person to understand what it is like. It fills them with the mentality needed to act in the situation. If you have played a shooter on X-Box Live it is clear to see this soldier mentality in action. It's creating people that will support war. If the design of the game is to further reinforce this fairly tale notion of war, then it only serves those that benefit from war. I think it to be possible to reflect on war in a way that would leave the player not siding with it. Or to at least start a debate. A perfect example would be Shadow of the Colossus, a fun game that examines themes of violence and the exploitation of nature. Playing GRAW and other games like it reminds me of imperative it is that we be aware of the messages within our media.

Meme: Video Game Covers I Want to See

2007-02-28T23:02:00.000-08:00

I interrupt the silence on this blog in order to bring you the question of the hour, as asked by Brand over at Yudhishthira’s Dice:

Ladies, what RPG covers (or interiors) have you seen that involve a woman in the
art that make you say, “I want to play that” or, just as good “I want to play
her.” Or that make you feel like it is a game you could like, or be included in
by a group of guys you’d never met and whose maturity you didn’t necessarily
know?

Tekanji decided that this was a great topic for a meme and I agree. The rules:

1.Copy the text of the original challenge from Yudhishthira’s Dice and give a proper link attribution.
2.Copy these rules exactly (including any links).
3.Find images of game covers (interiors are okay, too) that make you want to play the game. Any kind of game — video game, card game, tabletop RPG, etc — is fine. Post them and include a short (or long) explanation on why the image makes/made you want to play the game.
4. The original challenge is about finding out what women think about how game art is marketed and therefore it is targeted at women. I’d like to keep it that way, please.
5.You can tag as many or as few people as you want. You do not need to be tagged to participate in the meme.
6.When you make your post, please post the link on this thread so we can all see what others have said.

First on my list is the cover for the Sega CD version of Lunar: The Silver Star. This was the RPG that made a gamer out of me. While it doesn't score high as far as gender issues go in regards to the content (small town boy saves amnesia-stricken goddess) the story was engaging and addictive. What initially drew me to the cover was the striking character designs. Though the evil Magic Emperor dominates the frame of the image and literally holds the fate of Lunar in his heads, Luna--though hovering slightly behind Alex--is dead center. She has a sly smile on her face that is indicative of her role in the game. Even though she's the girl you get in the end, she isn't passive. Rather, she's capable of great power and has a knack of rallying people behind her, as she did with the other young girls who were captured. I also enjoy that I'm able to see much of the supporting cast of Lunar, for it provided anticipation as to who I was going to meet during my journey.

Next is another RPG, Xenosaga II. Though the second game of the Xenosaga trilogy may not be considered the greatest, the cover sure is. Kos-Mos dominates this cover (as she does in the first and third) yet she is not diminutive or sexualized. On the second game's cover, we are given the profile of Kos-Mos and the faces of some of the other important characters of the game. (Though, woefully, Momo is missing.) Kos-Mos is larger than life, staring blankly off into space. This speaks to her importance but also to the questions that her existence brings to mind. We know by this point that Kos-Mos is more than just a tool, but we are also wondering as to who she directly serves--Shion or someone evil?

Third is the cover of Silent Hill 3. Silent Hill 3 was my first hesitant venture into the Silent Hill universe, and it was Heather who guided me there. When I saw this cover at Gamestop I was struck by the amount of emotion that was held in her face. Namely that it seemed to ask "What the hell am I doing here?"--a feeling I've encountered more than once in my life. I felt that I could relate to the young woman on the cover, and that feeling carried me on through the game.

Next is the cartoony and cluttered cover of Dark Cloud 2. Max poses confidently with his wrench, while Monica is leaping into action, sword hoisted above her shoulder. While I'm not too fond of Monica being positioned behind Max, I'm glad that she's captured in an action shot. Monica's the warrior out of the two kids and from this cover that's obvious.

The last cover that I'm choosing to highlight is from a game I've never played: Digital Devil Saga 2. In fact, I haven't played any of the games from this series, though I desperately want to. I've seen other character designs and know that they come off as pretty androgynous, something I always like to see. On this cover, I've deduced that the character who is being framed by a funky monster is a woman. She stares out, sullen, her left hand a fist, her right arm transforming into something other-worldly. She looks tough, like someone not to be messed with, despite her short stature. She looks like a character I'd like to kick some ass with.

From these examples, it seems apparent to me that I prefer covers that relate to the plot and characteristics of the game. I often enjoy when many characters are included, for they add an element of foreshadowing. I also favor covers that convey a strong feeling, such as tension (like with Digital Devil Saga or Silent Hill 3) or mystery (Lunar and Xenosaga II). Sexualization of a character on the cover of a video game for the sake of nothing else but turning a profit will turn me away. I want covers that are thought out, striking and pertinent to the game at hand.

I tag: Brinstar, Amy, and Guilded Lily.

A Quick Note on Employment

2007-02-13T10:11:00.000-08:00

Since my last tirade, I’ve been quiet about my unemployment because who wants to hear about annoying temp assignments, job interviews and staffing agencies when there’s Zelda to talk about?

Last week, amongst the Chicago cold and snow (god, I want spring) I landed a temp to perm job. I have no idea how long it’s going to last, or if they’ll want to hire me on for full time eventually (so many factors beyond my control) but at the very least, for some amount of time, I’ll be earning a steady paycheck. Go me.

Of course though, with this comes all the usual anxieties of starting something new. You’d think I’d be getting used to it by now. I keep on thinking to myself, “Oh god, oh god, oh god, Excel.” And of course, “Will I be utterly bored?” I’m starting the job tomorrow, so I expect that I’ll be sleeping with my fingers crossed.

Wish me luck.

A very low toned and gruff warning to all those who have not played Gears of War.

2007-02-03T18:45:00.000-08:00

Before my rant, I just wanted to put out a reminder that the 10th Carnival of Feminist Science Fiction and Fantasy is up. Check out all the great posts at Adventures in Lame.

So recently I got to take a crack at Gears of War, courtesy of my brother's Xbox 360. The gameplay felt like a breeding between Resident Evil 4 and Halo. I enjoyed everything it took from RE 4, such as the camera, the aiming, the atmosphere, the interesting villains and AI. (Though I still like RE 4's a lot better.) The cover system was fun, and it kept me playing--though for only about 5 to 6 hours, because that's how long it took me to beat it...on Hard.

I'm really glad I didn't buy Gears of War, cause geez, it's short (and kinda easy too). There were a couple of tough parts, but it was pretty straight forward: shoot at things until the level ended. I don't understand why a 5 hour game has gotten so much attention.

Though that's not the worst part. I can deal with a short game, as long as it doesn't bombard me with images and concepts that all proclaim the glory of white men. This game does not want you to forget that these Gears carry packages. The creators took the idea of the super masculinized action hero of the 80's to such an extreme that all metal within a 10 foot radius of the T.V. has now formed a nice, manly rust. All of the characters have the proportions of a small truck, and grip mighty phallic machine guns that not only shoot hot lead, they also moonlight as a the manliest tool around: a chainsaw. CUT CUT CUT! MMMMaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrr! I was shocked at the extent in which they packed every male stereotype into this game. If I didn't know any better, I would think this was a joke, or some ironic piece of pop art.

Even the uberman's feelings toward others was well represented, for what's a Gear without his female supporter giving helpful tips over the radio, far removed and safe from mucking up all this manly action? And if I remember my American History X correctly, who could deny the convenience of the curb stomp? Why, a busy Gear can proclaim his love for hate crimes in one press of a button!

Rounding out this package of privilege is the Gear's always-entertaining black sidekick for comic relief. A man who not only has to be saved at first, but his name is 'trane--short for Coltrane.

Writer: "How should I name my token black character? What's a good 'black' name? Well...jazz musicians are are black, and they have names! Now let's think of the two jazz players I know..." (flips coin between Armstrong and Coltrane)

But apparently this character wasn't screaming black stereotype enough. The writer really wanted to flesh out his creation, so why not give 'trane a past career?

Writer: "How do black people make money? Oh yeah, they play football."

A professional football player. Sounds like the perfect combination of a shallow black character to me. All the writer had to do to capture his subtleties is to make 'trane smack talk the ground aliens with puns based off of his name. For instance: "Get off the tracks, cause the 'trane's coming through!" I must say, great writing for this post-racist society we live in.

Let's all celebrate this groundbreaking achievement in video games.

The Better to Arouse You With, My Dear

2007-01-24T21:39:00.000-08:00

My gaming history is somewhat cliche for my age range. For instance, the first RPG that I ever played was Final Fantasy VII, and I feel it responsible for my sad and painful blossoming into a gamer. Like many people, I've always held a shining, warm spot in my heart for the franchise.

My dedication to FF VIII was legendary within my circle of three friends, and I never felt closer to my brother than the summer of FF Tactics. But I can't bring myself to play FF XII. There is a giant racist roadblock preventing me from the "best game of the franchise." I would really like to meet the person who thought, "oh, lets make the first and only black female character this series has ever had into a sexy bunny."

I mean, come on. Nobody thought this image was in any way offensive? Despite the long tradition of showing the black community as nothing more than animals? And then to sexualize her on top of that! "Hi, I'm Fran. Please do me. I'm just an animal, so it's ok." If there were any other non-human characters, or if there was ther black human characters in the party it wouldn't be as bad. But the only image this game portrays of the black community is a dehumanizing one.

I understand that the subject of race in a Japanese-made game is a complicated subject. Japan is one of the most homogeneous countries in the world, so I am weary to scream foul when a game is made with only pseudo-Japanese characters in it--by which I mean that sometimes it's difficult to tell the race of a character that is drawn in an anime style. However, gaming has reached a global level, and triple A titles like the Final Fantasy series reach all over the world. I feel it is important for these companies to realize that a wide range of people play games, and it would be nice to see some healthy representation of that. At the very least, if you are going to diversify your supporting cast, don't fall back on centuries-old racist stereotypes.

Link, a Tool?

2007-01-15T11:15:00.000-08:00

Around halfway through The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess, something struck me. Through the plot structure and objectives of the game, it seems to me that Link largely acts as an instrument for female characters.

Besides Twilight Princess, I’m not too familiar with Zelda--I’ve only dabbled in the original, so I don’t know if this is something that has popped up before. I do know though that the premise of the original game stuck to the tried-and-true formula of save the princess. In later installments, that formula has evolved, and that seems to be true for Twilight Princess as well. This shift in plot has made the traditional hero that was Link into a sort of beast of burden for goddesses and princesses.

In Twilight Princess we have Midna, who rides Link’s back and has him hunting for fused shadows. Princess Zelda is relying on Link to free her kingdom from the confines of darkness, and the goddesses chose Link to save the world. Not to mention, there’s the Zora’s queen, the bar keeper, and that monkey with the pink bow. This is not to say that Link’s not helping out plenty of men too, but the majority Link’s services are for women. I say that’s because the women of Hyrule hold a lot of power and influence.

I should mention, too, that this is helped by the fact that Link doesn’t seem to have a personality. He just does what he’s told. We get to see his facial expressions, sure, but other than that he doesn’t utter one word, sigh or complaint.

For all intents and purposes, Link is a tool. He’s not just the medium for the gamer; he’s the trusty workhorse for the rest of the major and supporting characters.

Temporary

2007-01-10T12:27:00.000-08:00

I apologize that I've been straying away from what I initially envisioned that I'd be writing about on this blog, but I've been completely over taken by instances that are making the enjoyment that I take from comics, video games, and anime miniscule.

One of the big things in my life right now is that I'm unemployed. Like all who are unemployed and desperate for a paycheck are apt to do, I joined up with a temp agency. I took my tests, sweating and nauseous, I’ve taken my holiday and birthday checks and spent them on corporate wear from Goodwill. I’ve been practicing the application of eye shadow. I try speaking loudly and with confidence. I’ve mastered the trick of faking enthusiasm toward something that makes me burrow my head into my pillow at night and sob.

I told my temp agency that I’d be interested in working for non-profits, but they insist on sticking me in a corporate setting. I can’t shrug off my awkwardness.

I understand that I’m probably sound whiney and immature—that I’m being melodramatic in a situation that I can’t avoid. That I’m sounding over privileged. After all, I was able to attend and finish college when my parents, aunts, uncles and grandparents weren’t able to.

I’m trying to suck it up, but it gets difficult with each $10-an-hour. I’m flat out bored and frustrated. I’m furious that I’m thousands of dollars into debt, yet the only job with benefits that I could only hope to qualify for is to be a receptionist or secretary.

Yesterday was a sunny day because I had a job interview with a community college, in foreign language studies and ESL department. It was dingy and messy. Student projects were taped up to the walls. The woman who interviewed me had a soft and soothing voice. It was only until halfway through the interview did I realize she was the department chair. And I have to wait until next Friday to see if I got the job.

Until then it’s the temp jobs. The nine-hour days with the hour lunch break where I hide the feminist book I’m reading. Where I try to sneak breaks on the company’s internet only to mess up when answering the phone a minute later. Each and every company’s name is a last name and I can’t keep any of them straight.

Hello, It's Me

2007-01-09T22:13:00.000-08:00

I'm feeling pretty good today, so I thought that I'd take advantage of my good mood and write up a post.

First things first, I'd like to point out a new blog that I've added to my sidebar. Fandrogyny features insightful feminist critiques of anime by Madeline Ashby. Good reads, plus I plan on seeking out all of her reviews so that I can keep caught up on the latest anime that I've been missing out on since I've cancelled my subscription to NewType USA.

I'm not going to making any of my own feminist critiques tonight, but I'm going to answer Lake Desire's tag and tell you all five things that you probably don't know about me. (Yes, the meme that has graced a thousand blogs.)

1. I know all the words to the opening song of Pokemon: Battle Frontier.

And I'm not afriad to admit it. I just started watching Pokemon about six months ago, and I'm now close to knowing the words for all the seasons' opening songs. Pokemon is too cute; it always gives me a lift when I'm in a bad mood.

2. My cat, Casey, is named after K-Ci from K-Ci and JoJo.

I didn't do it--blame my brother. I pretend she was named after the Casey from "Casey at the Bat."

3. I really enjoy it when games have milk in them.

Is it because I'm from Wisconsin? Or because I'm lactose intolerant? I love it when milk is a item (preferably, it heals). For whatever reason it makes me giddy. See: Dragon Quest VIII and Zelda: Twilight Princess.

4. I have a crush on both Buffy and Angel.

And when they kiss, it's perfect.

5. When I was little, I would pretend to conduct symphony orchestras.

One time my dad caught me, and I almost died from embarassment. That is, until he told me that he used to do it too. After seeing screenshots of that Wii conducting game, I have a feeling that my dad and I are far from alone.

Now that everyone knows how weird I am, I promise that soon I'll write up some posts that have a little meat to them.

Oh yeah, I meme-tag: Amy Reads (at her new blog address), Dan Jacobson, Madeline and Mickle.

Regrouping

2006-12-26T06:20:00.000-08:00

As if you couldn't tell, I'll be taking an extended break from blogging, due to unreliable access to the internet and the fact that my personal life is extremely hectic and overwhelming. When I get back, hopefully not too long from now, I plan to write some thoughts on Trauma Center and the first two seasons of Veronica Mars.

Happy New Year!

Harassment Fiasco

2006-12-13T18:52:00.000-08:00

I'm in the home stretch, just a couple of days away from graduating. That said, my job at the college will be finished this week as well. I feel conflicted about this: I'm losing my steady paycheck and I'll be leaving behind some great coworkers. However, I feel good about leaving: perhaps my job search will yield a job with better pay (though it should be easy to beat the pay of a student worker) and because I'll be leaving the place where I was sexually harassed.

Like anyone, there's a few things in my life that are hard for me to admit, and most of them seem to stem in some way from sex. Two of the biggies are admitting that I was in an abusive relationship, the other is that I was harassed at work.

I'm willing to write about this because my job ends Friday, but I've been inspired by this post about sexual harassment over at Occasional Superheroine. An excerpt:

I feel the person who has gone through this or other traumas definitely has the right to tell her (or his) story -- that it's part of the healing process and provides people going through similar situations with perspective & hope. Further, I think the topic of sexual harassment itself should be debated and examined thoroughly on message boards and forums everywhere.

But one thing that gets lost in the internet debate and gossip is just how goddamn sad sexual harassment situations are for everybody involved. They're fucking sad. There are no winners and losers. Everybody is a loser. Feelings on both sides are filled with agony and resentment and hurt. You have one side saying "nothing happened and you're liar" and the other side saying "I'm really really hurt" and it's like Iraq, there's no immediate clean way to resolve it. And then you have people caught in the middle who are pressured to take sides and it's shitty for them too.

My situation was (unsurprisingly) tortuous. Because my job is the same as where I attend school (I work in the department of my major) I had no way to get away from him. And, like a lot of harassment stories, my situation was not cut and dry. It's not like he touched me--it had more to do with comments he said under his breath or how he would come stand by me, his body almost touching mine. It was the manner in which he looked at me, and how I would see him staring at me while I was having lunch with my partner. It was long and drawn out and I didn't know how to tell him how he made me feel. I couldn't find the voice to tell him to stop. Eventually, I found the courage to go to my boss and make a report. What resulted was an awkward bureaucratic hell that consisted of embarrassing interviews and meetings that were full of difficult decisions. In the end I was told that I'd have to meet with him, along with Human Resources and the department chair for a mediation if I wanted to make a proper complaint. I couldn't go through with it--I was too terrified.

I regret it. Because I failed to commit to the mediation, my complaint was never officially filed. It was as if my tentative steps to make him stop never happened. My boss took care to not schedule my hours when he was working, which did help. However, I still saw him in the hallway or around campus. The lack of closure isn't what I necessarily regret. What has made the situation worse is that once he did stop harassing me, he went after a co-worker, a good friend, of mine. I make him sound cruel and calculating, but I honestly think that he didn't know that he was doing anything wrong. My co-worker, knowing what I had gone through with him, filed a complaint immediately. I admire the hell out of her. She went to meeting after meeting and never backed down, even though the chair of the department expressed to her his opinion that she was making a big deal out of nothing. The kicker in the end was that the professor was only given a warning after her formal complaint went through. I found out from my boss that he would have received a harsher punishment if I had went through with my complaint.

This semester I haven't had to deal with the professor because he's on sick leave for cancer. I think it's unfortunate that he has to struggle though an awful disease, but I'm relieved that I haven't had to work with him now or ever again. For all of my relief, I still feel unresolved about the situation and I still feel ashamed--as though I'm making a big deal out of nothing--whenever I talk about. I do hope that if I ever find myself in a similar predicament, I'll be quicker to stand up for myself.

It's hard for me to look at sexual harassment rationally since I still feel hurt. But I do think this: if my work wasn't so entrenched in hierarchies, maybe it wouldn't have happened. I know it surely wouldn't have happened if the professor would see women as people rather than sex objects.

Freaking Out

2006-12-10T22:10:00.000-08:00

By Friday this week it'll all be done, finished, the end, kaput. I'll be a graduating undergraduate, prepared and ready to face the cold, cruel world with a dashing hat and a collar pulled up around my cheeks.

Except I'm all anxious: anticipating unemployment, uncomfortable job interviews, and tens of thousands of dollars worth of debt. And even before that, I have four tests to take and ten page paper on Louis Zukofsky's objectivism to complete.

Yuck.

Some Mii Suggestions

2006-12-06T07:58:00.000-08:00

I've been able to spend a few weeks lovingly and obsessively creating Miis that represent me, my family and Robotech characters. It's a blast, but I have a few suggestions:

1) Picking a gender for your Mii shouldn't be mandatory. I understand why its there-- we're always asked what our gender is, from surveys to signing up for MSN Messenger. The Mii Channel uses it so that when a gender is chosen the haircuts that show up first correspond with whatever gender you chose. But what if you want to create an androgynous Mii (which is surprisingly easy to do) and you don't want to identify the Mii as male or female? It's unnecessary.

2) Haircuts should be organized by length instead of gender. Other categories, such as lips and eyes aren’t separated, so why is hair length? There aren't any restrictions in regards to choosing a feminine haircut for a male Mii anyway (which is awesome), so the distinction seems arbitrary. Having the hairstyles grouped by length would make customizing easier.

3) There should be more control over body type. I keep on running into this problem—I wanted to give the Mii that's supposed to look like me some hips, but I couldn't. Similarly, when I was trying to make an animorphic representation of my overweight cat, I couldn't make him look fat enough. Rats.

4) Untraditional hair colors need to be included. I know I'm not the only one out there who likes pink hair. And what about making a Mii that looks like Max Sterling? Only blue will do. Actually, a whole color wheel or spectrum should be included so that there are more hues for skin color and more choices for the color of clothing.

I'm thinking that a lot these issues could be remedied by an update. So what do you say, Nintendo?

Game Rag for Women

2006-11-24T20:05:00.000-08:00

According to GameSpot, there's going to be a new video game magazine launched in Germany:

The publisher describes the magazine, aimed at female gamers, as "fresh,
bold, upbeat, and feminine."

While I'm glad that female gamers are being acknowledged, I don't think the answer is to have a videovgame-themed magazine that'll tote the same tired gender stereotypes that plague most magazines that are aimed towards women and girls. Though it wasn't mentioned in the GameSpot article, I can see it now--a review of Jeanne D'Arc for the PSP on one page; facing it, an ad for make up.

While I do think there is a place for magazines that are dedicated to a female audience (I've often toyed with the idea of starting up my own little zine for feminist reviews of games) I can't help but wish there could be an effort made in the current video game publications to be more inclusive of a diverse audience. I know that if such a publication existed, I'd drop the money for a subscription immediately.

Urban Camping

2006-11-19T12:30:00.000-08:00

It rained. It snowed. After eight hours, the moisture had soaked through the weather-proofing on the sleeping bag and my toes were ice cubes. But at around 10 this morning, I came home with a Wii.

I wasn't going to camp out--I had a plan so that I'd be able to get at least some sleep before getting up early to wait in line. Yet by last night, when the neighbors decided to have a roaring party and I was anxiously pacing the apartment because I was unable to sleep, Shions_glasses and I decided to go check things out. I made a thermos of hot cocoa and packed some provisions: apple cinnamon rice cakes, cheese poofs, dried apple slices and dark chocolate M&Ms.

We arrived at Best Buy around midnight and the place had already drawn a crowd. We were outside for a good hour when it started to drizzle. It was my turn first to huddle beneath a quilt in the car while Shion_glasses braved the beginning of the precipitation in order to hold our place in line. When it was my turn to go out it started to rain and snow.

The night went by: instead of busying myself with my DS or reading any of the books I brought along, I listened to small talk and watched the snowflakes fall, illuminated by the parking lot lights.

The whole night went pretty smoothly. Everyone was kind to one another: one guy shared his extra large cheese pizza, another handed out some blankets, a woman passed out candy canes. The guy who was first in line made an unofficial list in which everyone signed up in order--and when it came to 8 am when employees started handing out tickets, there weren't any issues.

Getting inside felt amazing: my feet started to thaw. And though by then I was feeling pretty ridiculous that I had just spent most of my night awake and cold in a parking lot, I was pretty proud of myself when I was handed the white Wii box.

Gamers put themselves through some crazy crap, no?

Question

2006-11-18T11:10:00.000-08:00

I have a Japanese Dreamcast and an American version of Shenmue. I tried to use the Utopia boot disc to override the region coding, but the game isn't loading up. Does anyone have any ideas as to what I can do get the game to play? Thanks!

I don't even wear any.

2006-11-17T10:58:00.000-08:00

Today at work I was busily utilizing all the specialized electronics cleaner to shine up the apple of my eye (i.e. my ds lite) when a professor approached me and asked if I was cleaning my makeup case.

Needless to say, I died a bit inside.

I found out something weird this weekend.

2006-11-13T08:20:00.000-08:00

I found out Saturday night that I have some natural talent when it comes to playing Dead or Alive 2. A fighting game that's famous for breast-jiggling physics and I'm actually kind of good at it. After failing at all other fighting games.

The irony is not lost on me.

Edit: I just wanted to share some thing about the night in which I played DOA2: I was at a party, and we had already exhausted Mario Party and Mario Kart and needed a new four-player game. Thus, DOA2 was brought out and the XBox controllers were dusted off (both the game and the XBox were donated to my apartment by an estranged brother). The whole time playing it--with a few guys--not one sexist comment was made. After struggling in the past with playing games with guys, it was an unforgettable experience in which I felt truly a part of the gaming community.

Popularity Contest

2006-11-03T07:28:00.000-08:00

Bonnie Ruberg's written a piece for Joystiq about Rockstar's Bully controversy. An excerpt:

By now, we all know about Jimmy Hopkins' boy-on-boy kissing adventures. A few
voices have leapt out in predictably outraged protest but, for the most part,
the gaming world has been strangely accepting of Jimmy's bi-curiosity –
surprising in a community where a normal evening on Halo 2 (you know it's
happened to you) usually includes watching a preteen with a Xbox Live headset
shoot ammo into your lifeless corpse while shouting, "You're dead, homo!"

I've also been surprised at the general reaction of the video game community. But really, here you have Rockstar--the coolest kid on the block because they make xtreme games about car-jacking, prostitutes and gangs--and then you have Jack Thompson--the most hated man in all of videogamedom--crying "gay sex!" Who's side are you going to choose? The cool kid, totally.

Not that I think that this is going to stop any of the homophobic talk on XBox Live or in living rooms across the nation. And not that I think Rockstar had hopes of curing the rampant homophobia among gamers.

Also, you might want to hop on over to Bonnie's blog--that's where discussion of the piece is taking place. A warning: you might have to dodge and parry some heterosexual privilege in the comments.

Pageant Hid as Revolution: Miss Video Game 2007

2006-10-30T07:42:00.000-08:00

Looky what I came across when sifting through my bloglines for Jade Reporting:

Be Miss Video Game

Requirements:

1. Must have Personality

2. Must be a female? (No wigs and makeup guys)

3. Doesn't mind Video Games :P

4. Loves the beach

Here's their mission statement:

We are on a Mission

To assist in the proliferation of females in gaming genres of all types and to help raise awareness of the female gaming audience among game publishers and advertisers. To make the gaming industry take women gamers seriously and to treat them with respect as equals.

Goals
-To showcase female gaming talent and the amazing variety among female gamers.
-To create a positive role model for young girls who enjoy playing video games.
-To break the stereotype that gaming is a male dominated industry.
-To have a good time in a fair and friendly environment.

Miss Video Game was created in order to showcase female gaming talent and
marketable female gamers to gaming publishers and industry decision-makers as well as the gaming community as a whole. We're here to put female gamers on the
map and to get them taken seriously (and also to send some lucky female gamers
to Cabo ;-).

Ladies - join up now, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. This could be the start of a great career in gaming or promotions. Even if you don't know anything about video games sign up and learn - that's what this is all about, spreading gaming to women around the globe!!!

So let's see if I get this straight: an ageist, sexist, and homophobic contest created to spread the word about women and video games, omigod! While I agree with all of their goals, I can't get on board with their method--a beach-loving, conventionally beautiful babe can't be a representative for the "amazing variety among female gamers." She sure won't represent me.

Just Want to Point This Out

2006-10-27T09:56:00.000-07:00

Piny has a must-read over at Feministe about bisexuality. An excerpt:

You know, one thing that has always struck me as unduly burdensome for
bisexuals, as well as a likely source of intimidation and a disincentive to be
out, is the idea that there’s some threshold below which one is a weekender, a
tourist, a closet case, a faker, or–worst of all–heterosexual. Blithe
ambivalence cannot coexist with scrutiny. (Exhibitionism, on the other hand,
cannot exist without it.) A bisexual who is constantly pressured to evaluate the
relative pitch and frequency of their same-sex and opposite-sex attraction is a
bisexual who has a harder time simply loving and lusting. A bisexual who must
weigh the potential joy of queer partnership against loathing and denigration
from all sides is a bisexual who is less likely to nurture any queer romantic
feelings, particularly if they seem supplemental.

Adieu, Dark Cloud 2

2006-10-27T09:28:00.000-07:00

Last weekend, Shions_Glasses and I beat Dark Cloud 2. Though 100+ hours into it, and we still have the epilogue to go. Needless to say, we'll be taking a break from it. (Baten Kaitos: Origins, anyone?)

I adored Dark Cloud 2 and I loved seeing the similarities between it and Dragon Quest VIII: the graphics were gorgeous, the georama aspect was almost perfect, and I loved customizing the ridepod and weapons. My only complaints about it are pretty minor: why couldn't we play as Monica for spheda or fishing? Why were her monster transformations useless? At least she's the stronger fighter.

My biggest gripe was how they handled the end boss(es). Note to any aspiring (or current) game programmers: if you're gonna throw at us multiple battles at the end of the game that last about an hour, give us a save point. Especially if it's timed and you have to figure out the key to beating the end boss (i.e. no straight out ass-whupping.) I almost threw my PS2 controller against the wall when I realized that I'd have to play the last hour or so of the game again when I didn't figure out how to beat the end boss right away. Annoying. We had to wait at least another week to find the time to finish the game, and when we did, I practiced some asanas and made Shions_Glasses do the dirty work. Ahh, multitasking.

Bits & Pieces

2006-10-17T18:48:00.000-07:00

Better late than never, please be sure to check out the 6th Feminist SF Carnival over at the Hathor Legacy.

The next edition will be on November 20, and will be hosted Racy Li over at Racy Thoughts. The deadline is November 17.

Also, Ragnell and Kalinara have declared this week to be Cheesecake/Beefcake Appreciation Week. Here's my ~~hunk of cheddar~~ contribution:

This makes me giggle.

Rest in Peace, Gentle Blue Monster

2006-10-10T17:13:00.000-07:00

Scene: A sunny and calm Saturday afternoon in Everytown, USA. Switch to interior of Best Buy, Customer Service desk.

Protagonist: Excuse me, I need to return this. [Places blue brick in box on desk.] The touch screen doesn't seem to be as responsive as it used to be and the left trigger button is sticking. Oh yeah, I have the 2-year warranty. [The protagonist shakily lifts up a wrinkled pamphlet.]

Customer Service Representative: [Takes package and pamphlet.] Hold on one moment, I'll have to check things out in the back.

P:Okay. [Stands, biting fingernails.]

Some long, awkward moments pass. The Customer Service Rep comes back to the front.

CSR: You're all set. Why don't you go get a replacement? We'll just do a switch.

P: [squeaks] Yes! [All but runs to the Nintendo section of the store and comes back gingerly carrying the box of a new shiny, shimmering DS Lite.]

CSR: You just did this so that you can get the pink one!

P: . . . No comment.

4 Color Rebellion Links to Porn and Misses Point Entirely (or Porn is not Art)

2006-10-08T18:55:00.000-07:00

I like blogs and I like video games. I like to look at video game blogs. I liked to visit 4 color Rebellion: Nintendo-focused, good writing, and they're respectful of their readers. So why did they link to Nerdcore's new calendar? Oh, because they love and respect women.

I was pissed (as were others.) I angrily wrote in the comments:

Long time lurker [here,] just [want] to say this: it can be really discouraging being a woman gamer, and even more discouraging trying to find a blog that publishes pertinent news about video games (re: I don't have to shift through all the sexist crap.) Porn, yeah, fine, it's out there. But really, 4cr was a safe haven for someone
like me, who likes to think that maybe one day women can be thought of as gamers
instead of just wank material.

Nick, from who the post originated, had this to say as a reply:

I knew when I posted this that some would find it offensive. But if you want to see the reasoning behind it, scroll up and read Gregs comment. Amen.

Greg's comment was along the lines of 1) Porn is part of geek culture 2) Just ignore it if it offends you 3) We at 4cr love women! We have relationships with them! 4)What we really need to be concerned about is if children see it. Okay. Well, 1) You can write about porn in geek culture, by all means, but it can be done in a respectful (non-sexist) manner. 2) I'm sick and tired of having to ignore sexist crap on video game blogs just because I'm not a heterosexual guy. 3) Having relationships with women doesn't inoculate you against being sexistst and 4) I'm glad you care more about the other demographics on your blog more than the women gamers who frequent it.

As far as women... I love women. And I don't mean that in a sexist way. I was raised by my mom, all by herself and I have the utmost respect for women. My ex-girlfriend of 7 years was also very concerned with women's rights and their role in society. I was right there beside her and agree 100% that women deserve better. I understand the hardships women have to face. Yet do I find strippers offensive? No. I know quite a few girls who used to be strippers and these girls know very well what they are doing. Some of them are very savvy and if they can use their bodies to influence people or make a living, they will.

Oh, okay. You, with all of your male privilege in it's undying glory, understand the hardships women face. There is so much wrong with the above paragraph--I don't think I need to touch it with a ten foot pole. It speaks for itself.

That said, I also love the female figure as a work of art. As a fine art painter, all I paint is the human form. Both female and males are beautiful creatures that continually fascinate me.And then of course, I have to admit, I do like sex and sexy women. I've spent time in Italy and my view on nudity is closer to theirs than our generally uptight and overprotective stance here in the US. I believe that people just need to relax and understand the role of sex in society. That's not to say we should abuse it, but it is there and always will be. And of course, sex sells.

Note to self, as informed by Nick: If I hate seeing women objectified, I'm a prude. Also, there are no prudes in Italy. And art is free from objectification.

So, yes, I apologize if I offended anyone, but at the same time, I wont apologize for posting this.In fact, my biggest concern with posting this was that in some way it might cause 4cr to get blocked for people at work. Now that would be a real problem.

Translation: Don't get your undies in a bundle. By the way, your issue is nothing compared to inconveniencing the other straight guys when they can't check our blog at work.

My reply, and probably last comment:

Nick, I'm glad you're a heterosexual guy, I really am. I just felt sick about being reminded, yet again, that women are the sex class. Objectification is objectification.

Bodies the Size of Zero

2006-10-08T09:28:00.000-07:00

I was scrolling through Feministing the other day when the post Doing the Unthinkable! caught my eye. While the point of the article is extremely interesting, I want to focus more on this comment made by Samhita:

Furthermore, how come nobody has mentioned the fact that a size 0 means it
doesn't exist. Zero means nothing or that it is not there, so in a way it is
like the metaphorical erasure of women, as though they don't exist or that they
don't take up any space. Just a thought.

A lot of the commenters, who are size 0 themselves, took offense to this. They thought Samhita was saying that they don't exist, or thought that she was bashing them to be size 0.

I hadn't noticed until fairly recently that clothing stores have been changing their sizes so that a larger size is size zero. Some of my friends were happy about this, telling me how they now could feel better about their bodies when trying to find a pair of pants. I don't see it this way. I feel that the sizing of clothes is arbitrary: I never know from store to store what size to look for, it's always grab at least three different sizes and head to the changing room. The new move for size zero, I'm sure, is a way for clothing stores to boost the self-esteem of their clientele so that they buy more clothes--the beauty of capitalism. I can't help thinking, and what Samhita was hitting on in her post, is that in our patriarchal society, being thin is best because when you're small you don't take up space or impose. We are taught to want to be small, petite, skinny because it's beautiful and healthy. There's a lot of different facts out there that can be conjured up that say that bodies that aren't thin are unhealthy and lazy. Our ideas of what is thin and what is obese has become dangerously skewed, for bodies that are perfectly healthy yet larger than what is acceptable have been called obese.

I've struggled particularly with that. My body isn't the same as it was when I was 18: I've put on weight, there's mounds where there were angles. I eat healthy, I exercise every day, and damnit, I should be happy with my body, because it's at place where it wants to be. Yet, that's hardly ever the case, I've internalized the beauty myth, and it's come to the point where I wonder if the yoga I do is for the health of my body or if it's to slim down, tone, or decrease in size. I want to be petite, I want to look like Buffy.

The new size zero wasn't implemented so that women are easier on our bodies, it was put into to place so that we buy new clothes. Whatever. The fashion industry will always be our friend and enemy. Samhita wasn't criticizing anyone for being a size 0, she was just trying to talk about the societal baggage that comes with the size. What I hope to do is to accept my body as it wants to be, and to accept all the different sizes that women are: it's not easy when anyone is seen as too skinny or too overweight.

The 5th Carnival of Feminist Science Fiction and Fantasy Fans

2006-10-02T00:15:00.000-07:00

Welcome to the fifth edition of the Carnival of Feminist Science Fiction and Fantasy Fans! We have a full plate to offer you: from G4 to Wizard, and from princesses to perverts.

Comics

First up, Jenn revisits an old debate between Ragnell and Scipio in her post Sexual Dimorphism and Feminism and looks at the scientific position on sexual dimorphism in the human brain. She notes

Fundamentally, I and other feminists must adapt our philosophy to incorporate the findings of science, and vocalize the fact that science cannot and should not be used to justify unequal treatment.

Over at Snap Judgements , Carla laments Joss Whedon’s impending run on Runaways by bringing up examples of his treatment of Kitty and Emma in Astonishing X-Men. In Unscrewing the Inscrutable, Marionette makes someone at Marvel take a moment to think. Jeremy versus the X-Men and finds a link between comics and being a stay-at-home-dad. And jlg1 looks closely at Pantha in Nobody helped me. Nobody cared.

Soyoerika discusses breast physics, bras and Arisia over at Zamaron:

Brothers and Sisters, I invite you to join me in a round of boggling at this
so-called character design. While I can buy the impracticality of the eighties
outfit, I simply cannot wrap my brain around the current outfit at all.

To go along with this, Kalinara offers up her analysis of Manly Men and Buxom Babes. Meanwhile, Ragnell studies Black Panther and Storm’s first fight as a married couple. She also covers for us the sexist trainwreck known as Wizard Magazine’s “How to Draw” series and the reactions from the female superhero fan community found on livejournal.

We’re all holding our breaths waiting to see who’s going to be cast as Wonder Woman, and Amy Reads over at Arrogant Self-Reliance is no exception. While many of us have an inkling of who we’d maybe want to see, Amy’s main concern is that the actress cast demonstrates the wonder of her namesake.

Web Comics

Though she’s been a fan of Scott’s Kurtz’s PvP for awhile, Robyn discusses her hesitation of remaining a regular reader in her post In Which I am Annoyed by PvP.

Also, make sure to check out how to draw comics the Planet Karen way.

Writing

Cassiphone, at Velvet Threads writes of the camaraderie and literary experience that she encountered after sending in a story to Fantasy and Science Fiction for the Slushbomb. Racy Li wonders why there isn’t and makes her case for there to be more of a connection between science fiction and erotic romance in Erotic Romance: Science fiction’s forgotten stepsister. Malachi explores the relationship between fiction and feminism by looking at the “princess syndrome” in fantasy. In the post On Cartography and Dissection, little light writes beautifully about being the Other.

Video games

Baring all about her love for video games, Blitzgal interprets the implications and frustrations about being a woman gamer, and gives a few helpful suggestions on how games could be better in her post But why do her boobs have to jiggle like that? And at her blog, Wonderland, Alice gives a run-down of Games for the Ladies. Lake Desire points us over to Fiona Cherbak’s piece, the Game Industry’s 100 Most Influential Women and also directs attention to some of the misogynistic elements in the ever-popular Katamari Damacy.

On the feminist gamer livejournal community, tekanji asks for input on how to measure feminist elements in video games. At Old Grandma Hardcore, Tim writes about Grandma’s semi-disastrous appearance for a discussion on women gamers for G4’s Attack of the Show. Bonnie Ruberg asks if there is there a gender divide in the narratology vs. ludology debate.

Television

In Life on Mars: Isn’t that where men come, BetaCandy gives us the goods on BBCAmerica’s show, Life on Mars. Good (as in feminist), it ain’t:

The minute a young woman with stereotypical prettiness gets a closeup, I know
she’s either going to get hurt or get laid.

Mickle, over at The True Confessions of an Hourly Bookseller identifies the Women in Refrigerator syndrome in the Season 2 of Lost. Beware the spoilers! Desdenova takes NBC’s new show Heroes to task for the poor treatment of its two token female characters. Sageness posts her thoughts and discussion with thete1’s about gender and race in Stargate Atlantis.

Anime

We only have one anime-related post for this edition of the carnival, and it’s about a subject that’s near and dear to my own heart: Cattygurl discusses some of the Kick-ass Women of Anime.

Reviews

Martin guides us through Ursula K. LeGuin's young adult novel Voices. Sleestak informs us about Shanna the She-Devil by Tony DeZuniga at Lady, That’s My Skull. Cassiphone looks at the female protagonists of Kylie Chan’s White Tiger and Tim Pratt’s True Adventures of Ranger Girl. And Heidi Meely gushes about Virgin Comics’ Devi.

Megatrouble rebuts Thomas Disch’s claim “that Mary Wollstonecraft Shelly and Ursula K. Le Guin’s contributions to science fiction are overrated” in her post Shelly, Russ, and Le Guin: How to Hide the Canons; Or, What Could Have Been a Really Fun Party if Not for Thomas Disch.

The Harlan Ellison Incident

The feminist SF fan community acted in outrage when Harlan Ellison groped Connie Willis at the Hugo Awards. In response to the incident, Kadymae writes her manifesta Nice Girls Don’t… in which she states

if it had been me up there on the stage at the Hugos and Harlan Ellison put a hand where it didn't belong, at the very least he would've been shoved away and asked, "What do you think you're doing, asshole?"

Yonmei points out that Harlan Ellison has always been a sexist creep. Lis Riba reported on the whole incident herself and asks, “What does a woman have to do to get a little respect in this industry?"

Fandom

Peaseblossom, in her post How Much XP for a Blow Job? discusses the sexism that some women have to endure just to play a game:

Telling someone (or implying it, or complaining about it to a third party) that
she gets special treatment from the gm because they're romantically involved is
as adolescent as it is sexist.

Becky encounters in her post Hey, didn’t I used to write for a website called GeekGirls? Time Out New York’s idea of nerd girl, or rather, the NILF.

Melody Kitty loves being a fangirl, but she’s sick and tired of the objectification and depowering of superhero women. In another post, she challenges the geek fan community as a whole to stop stereotyping and be more observant of women within the community. Similarily, Willow wonders how we could open up dialogue with fanboys away from stereotypes to prove that we care about female characters in If The Fanboys Think We're Jealous, How Do We Win?

And last but not least, make sure you swing by Ladyjax’s blog, she’s holding a call of submissions for Boom Tube: a zine about Race, Culture and Fandom. Issue one’s theme will be dedicated to fans of color focusing on their experiences.

Thanks for reading! Mark your calendars; Revena at The Hathor Legacy will be hosting the next carnival on October 16.

Price gouging, or anything else for that matter, does not equal rape

2006-09-21T11:34:00.000-07:00

You know what I absolutely hate? When fans use the word rape as an analogy.

For example this comment (found in this comment thread):

Pfft, after the catastrophe that was the Nintendo Wii Europe Event followed
of course by the news that the Wii is not region free, I wen't in a matter of
days from being an avid Wii fanboy to completely and utterly disinterested.I
also know that I am not alone in this. Many, especially Europeans, are just sick
of the rape. I mean, at £133 for GameCube technology + some sensors, even Japan is getting extorted.

There's a sickening amount of privilege being exercised when someone can throw out a comment like this.

Too many times I come across it. And it's random. It's comments like that, the comments that completely trivialize rape, that make me want to leave my fandom behind, never click on my internet browser icon, throw the computer out the window.

It's rape. It's a hate crime. It's serious. Don't use it while in a fit of melodrama.

For Real?

2006-09-19T10:01:00.000-07:00

According to Graham Cracker's site, (sorry if this is old news) tomorrow I'm going to find out who the father of baby Helena is.

My money's on Sam, especially after last month's issue. But I have to say that I'm surprised that we'll learn her dad's identity so soon--I expected the whole "who's-the-father" plotline to be dragged out for longer.

Call for Submissions: Feminist Science Fiction Carnival

2006-09-17T10:09:00.000-07:00

The fifth Feminist Science Fiction Carnival will happen here at this blog on October 2.

All relevant blog posts about Feminist Science Fiction and Fantasy since August 24 onward is fair game--the deadline for the carnival is September 25.

Email me at 100littledolls[at]sbcglobal.net or fill out this submission form. You can also visit the official blog of the carnival if you have any questions about the guidelines and for links to past editions of the carnival.

Here are the guidelines:

--All Weblog Postings on Science Fiction and Fantasy works in all media
(books, comic books, television, film, roleplaying tabletop games and video
games) written from a Feminist Perspective are eligible.
--Fan fiction written from a Feminist Perspective is eligible.
--Posts about fan fiction written from a Feminist Perspective are eligible.
--Posts about conventions and fan gatherings of a Feminist nature are eligible.
--Posts about conventions and fan gatherings written from a Feminist Perspective are eligible.
--Posts about any science fiction or fantasy fandom written from a Feminist Perspective are eligible.
--Posts linking to newsand announcements are eligible, so long as they pertain specifically to the Feminist Sci-Fi Fantasy community.
--Considerations about science fiction/fantasy news from a Feminist Perspective are eligible.
--Analysis of non-Feminist works from a Feminist Perspective are eligible.
--Rants about any of the above written from a Feminist Perspective are eligible.
--Posts which spell “Space” using 3 A’s and two exclamation points and are written from a Feminist Perspective are eligible.
--Posts about Green-Skinned Amazons (from Outer Spaaace!) with more than two breasts that are not written from a Feminist Perspective will not be eligible (and if they aren’t damned funny,* will be reproduced for mockery).
--Posts about Getting Your Girlfriend into [specific type of fandom] had also better be damned funny. If written from a Feminist Perspective (even tongue-in-cheek), they will be eligible.

*Sexist and/or homophobic does not equal damned funny, nor does it constitute anything
approaching a Feminist Perspective.

Looks like I'll be camping out on the eve of November 19

2006-09-14T08:23:00.000-07:00

This morning as soon as my fingertips hit a computer keyboard, I headed over to 4 Color Rebellion to get the dirt about the Wii. $250? Sweet. November 19th release date? I can't wait. One type of packaging? Score. Only available in white? Sadness. I've never been a fan of white electronics.

When I first saw the Wii and got an eyefull of the red and lime green versions, I salivated. Alas, it's not to be. I'm sure in the future Nintendo will release different colored consoles, but I won't be able to wait that long!

Also, be sure to check out Wii's official website.

Highlights from the Highlife, Part 1

2006-09-10T10:48:00.000-07:00

I’m sorry I haven’t updated sooner—jet lag had to beaten down, family had to be seen, and my last semester of college has begun (I can already tell that it’ll be a lot of work. Papers even have to be written for my yoga class.) I don’t want the blog to lag or suffer for my lack of time management, so my goal is to post at least once a week. Also, I’ve figured that I don’t have time right now to post any one or few massive posts of Japan, so I’ll just write a bunch of little ones.

My first glimpse into Japan was its incredibly easy transportation. We had to get from Kansai International, which is just outside of Osaka to Nagahama, which sits on the eastern side of Lake Biwa in the Shiga Prefecture. The train trip took about two hours. We might have not been able to do it on our own, if not for the JR’s scrolling electronic boards that displayed the stops in kanji, kana and romaji.

Hindsight bias intact from visiting the larger cities of Japan, it’s safe to say that Nagahama is a sleepy city. Though the size of the population (around 80,000) puts to shame the small Wisconsin town I grew up in, and even with it’s array of rice fields, a decent sized main street and distinctive downtown area, it didn’t feel much larger. It was the perfect place in which to compare the rural Japan to urban Japan.

My friend, a JET instructor, lives in an apartment building named Highlife Morii. His apartment is outfitted with a tatami floor, sliding doors, and a toilet that’s located in its own closet-sized room. On top of the back of the toilet had a spout with which you could wash your hands. Yes, with toilet water. I loved it.

Nagahama castle is absolutely beautiful, but I unfortunately didn’t have the opportunity to go inside of it. Instead, most of the time spent in Nagahama was in Kurokabe Square, or Black Wall Square. Most of the buildings in this area were built, I believe, in the Meiji period. Walking through this winding section of stores and restaurants while taking in the smell of old wood and frying pork felt like traveling back in time. Glass workshops, for which Nagahama is well known for, are also located here. Sculptures, such as the giant kaleidoscope showcased the talent found here. Just one day here was enough for me to shed off all the stress I had brought with me from Chicago.

Looking for a Translator

2006-09-03T21:17:00.000-07:00

I'm back to the blog and country. I think I'll leave the play by play of the trip to 100littledolls, I just wanted to bring up some small observations. This was my second opportunity to visit Japan, so I was a little more prepared this time. Meaning, I brought a handkerchief to wipe all the drool off my face every time I walked into a store and saw all the wonderful games that I'll never be able to play. RPGs, Pokemon, strategy games, survival horrors and a remake of Dragon Quest V that looked so yummy. They had their share of stinkers over there, but I was genuinely excited for most games I saw. It was a strange experience. One that happens less and less in the States. I'm not to fond of the FPS GTA clone combo that fill the shelves here in America. It was nice to know that somewhere in the world there are still plenty of games that I would enjoy. (Although I can't play them unless I learn the language or a company brings them over.)

I complain, but I do enjoy and respect many games made in the western hemisphere. And I was shocked that my favorites were no where to be seen. Example: I went to the electronics districts in three major cities, Terimachi Street in Kyoto, Den Den Town in Osaka, and Akihabara in Tokyo, and I did not see one copy of Oblivion. Now I understand that the 360 is doing terrible in Japan, but I thought this game would have at least been pushed more. I mean, its a pretty impressive game. It might not have come out yet, but there weren't any advertisements. I found it weird and kind of sad that even the quality games don't seem to make it tp Japan. The PC sections did have a bunch of the hits from America translated into Japanese, but the consoles were lacking. The imported game section that I did find proudly displayed Tiger Woods, NBA Live, and American versions of Nintendogs. No wonder American game products are seen as lacking if this is all that is seen.

Oh well, I really never thought I would be defending Western games, but I guess its just an extension of the sadness I feel when I know I will never play all those juicy Japanese RPGs. I just wish that there was a better exchange of games between our two countries. Lately I've felt that the two markets have been growing farther and farther apart. I just hope that in the next generation, there will be less polarization, and more of a coutinuaty in the games that are released. (I want more RPGs!) I believe that the Nintendo Wii has the best chance of this in it's early attempt of trying to appeal to everyone. Maybe it'll create more of a cohesive video game world in the process.

Home Again, Home Again

2006-08-29T15:45:00.000-07:00

And I'm back. Sorry I couldn't update--there was little internet to be had in between riding the JR, losing my passport and eating cups full of shaved iced. I had a blast and now I have jet lag. Badly.

My goal is to slowly catch up on what I've been missing (a seemingly impossible task) and to write either a series or mammoth post, complete with pictures, about my trip.

I also have plans to lock myself up in a room and read the latest Bitch magazine from cover to cover. An issue that includes articles about Wonder Woman and Jem deserves my undivided attention.

Face, Flyers and Comics

2006-08-05T10:24:00.000-07:00

First, before I talk about Wizard World, I want to direct your attention over to New Game Plus. Lake Desire’s put up the third edition of the Carnival of Feminist Science Fiction and Fantasy Fans. It’s not to be missed!

The Flyers

Mid morning, Shions_Glasses and I met up with Dan Jacobson (who really is an incredibly sweet guy). We chatted, and then took to the convention floor with an important mission: handing out Girl-Wonder.org flyers to the comic book masses.

In the past I’ve distributed flyers for various causes before, not to mention that last year I was responsible for giving out condoms on my college campus. It’s always been a bit nerve wracking for me, as I’m not the most outgoing person. But it was different at Wizard World. While I did have to initially muster up the courage so that I was able to approach strangers with a certain amount of confidence, I found that once I started, I couldn’t stop. Our plan of attack was to hit the major exhibitors booths, like Wizard, Marvel and DC, and work our way back to Artist Alley. This included slipping flyer’s randomly in Dark Horse bags, and sliding others into hardcover Frank Cho nudie books. I placed some at the wrestling ring’s booth, and others at booths that were seemingly empty. (Which is how some were placed at Peter David’s booth.) Shions_Glasses and Dan focused more on the fanboys, while I handed out flyers mainly to the fangirls. Nearly everyone was incredibly nice, even supportive, and it was awesome to see many of the women in Artist Alley get excited when I explained Girl Wonder’s mission. My absolute favorite moment was when Shion gave a flyer to Greg Land. Think he’ll visit the site?

Because we received such a great reception, I truly think it’d be worthwhile for Girl Wonder to have it's own booth at Wizard World next year. I’d be all over volunteering to sit at it.

The Well-Known

One of the best parts of Wizard World is seeing those that you admire. While resting by the Snackoteria, we saw none other than Dirk Benedict, aka Face from the A-Team (or you know, Lt. Starbuck in Battlestar Galactica). Shions_Glasses took pictures of him ordering popcorn, but alas, I accidentally erased them. (Sadly, I lost all my pictures from Wizard World). Shion also ran up to shake his hand—I hear he’s a nice a guy.

David Mack had his own booth at Wizard World--just like last year--which he tirelessly manned on his own. I’m a huge fan of his work, and whenever I’ve gone up to talk to him I become hopelessly tongue-tied. No matter; just like last year, he patiently listened to me stumbled over my words, gave me a deal on a couple of his books, and then presented to me, after I gave him a Girl Wonder flyer, a beautiful print which he gave to me for free. A day later and I’m still swooning.

The Loot

I pretty much bought all the comics that were on my list:
--All issues of Catwoman that were penned by Will Pfeifer that I didn’t already have
--The second TPB of She-Hulk from Dan Slott’s first run
--The third TPB of Gotham Central
--The first TPB of Batgirl: Year One
--The first volume of the Revolutionary Girl Utena manga

Not to mention that I learned how the play the Pokemon card game, and loved every second of it.

Ja, mata.

Late tomorrow, Shions_Glasses and I are leaving for Japan, and will be gone for three weeks. I’m not sure the next time I’ll be able to post, but I’ll try to keep things updated here as much as possible. ::Blows internet kiss:: See you around!

It's Like A Holiday

2006-08-01T08:33:00.000-07:00

We're a couple days away from Wizard World! I have a pretty long list of comics I'm looking for and have been holding out from buying, so I'm super excited.

I'll really be packing it in. Since I'm leaving the country on Sunday, I'll have to squish in panels, the exhibitors floor, and the artist alley all in one day. Not to mention that I'll be handing out girl-wonder.org flyers while doing so, and meeting up with the fantastic Dan Jacobson.

Also, a plug: when walking through the artist alley, be sure to stop by local Chicago artist Sarah Becan's booth. I adore her work.

My Type of Thesis

2006-07-28T17:43:00.000-07:00

While I was not working at work, I discovered this cool interview with Robert Parungao that Gamespot put up. Maybe this is old news, but I thought what he has to say about racism in video games is very insightful. This is an issue that has bothered me for some time now, and it was nice to see a site like Gamespot discussing it. Even though the title is a little inflammatory, and the comments should be read at your own risk, I think its worth checking out. I would love to read his full thesis.

I unfortunately read through the comments. I couldn't believe the amount of resistence and fear towards this guy's thesis. I don't understand how people can deny someone's study of racism so easily. I did think it was cool to see that some people defended the article. It made me start to think that I should e-mail those people and get their friend codes. I would love to have a community of people that I knew it would be safe to play with online.

Masculinity, Nerds and Me

2006-07-26T10:58:00.000-07:00

In one way or another, I found myself in the company of a bunch of fanboys this past weekend. At first, I was thrilled. What new games would I play? (Super Mario Strikers) What comics would I be able to pick up and read for free on the sly? (JLA #0)

And at first, it was good. I felt accepted. I held my own in Strikers even though it was my first time playing. I got to talk about Catwoman and Chris Bachelo. Nerd talk uninhibited.

But then, unexpectedly, it started. Faggot. Pussy this, pussy that. Vagina this, slut that. Dumbfounded and silent, I held my tongue. Sat rigidly on the couch, smoothed out my skirt, buried my face in a comic.

It was naive of me not to expect this. And I thought that I’d be prepared for this situation, where talk turns sour and everything becomes an insult. The amount of sexism and homophobia was staggering. I thought I’d be able to make some quick witty comebacks (filled with insightful knowledge) that would enlighten or at least make them shut up. After all the theory I’ve studied. Everything I’ve written on this blog, everything I’ve read on other’s blogs. You’d think I’d be able to come up with something. The only time that I was able to say anything was when one of the guys asked if I was looking at my own boobs. I shot him down so quickly and defensively that I surprised myself. I shocked him, and I’m sure the group was happy when I left—I was the bitch who ruined all the fun.

I first I felt exasperated. Do these guys represent the majority of the fan community that I want to be a part of? I mean, I desperately want to be part of some sort of group of people who share the same interests as I. But can that even occur because I’m a woman? At Wizard World I’ll be handing out flyers for girl-wonder.org as a way to be proactive, as an attempt to further create a space for women in geekdom. Yet, after my intensive nerd run-in, passing out flyers doesn’t seem to be good enough. Writing in this blog doesn’t seem to be good enough.

As a few days have now passed and my hopelessness has ceded a bit. I’ve been thinking and thinking about the whole situation and managed to come up with this: the guys I was around were taking part in a form of alternative masculinity. They’ve suffered the consequences of not being traditionally masculine: they’re not rich, they don’t have tight bodies or physical prowess. A way for them to prove their masculinity is through wins and game scores, and extensive comic book knowledge. Another way is verbal; by using sexist and homophobic slurs, masculinity can be proved by effeminizing their peers.

I’m not interested in games, comics, anime, what have you, in order to prove anything. My interest is that I simply like them. I think the guys I came in contact with initially started out the same way, but found that as they grew older and had their masculinity questioned, they had to use their hobbies as a way to prove themselves. I, as a geek girl, stand in direct opposition to that, which is why I failed, after the first couple of hours, to find a common ground with them.

Access to Power

2006-07-22T08:10:00.000-07:00

Thanks to When Fangirls Attack, I've come across Megham Daum's article for the LA Times that discusses Batwoman's lesbianism. She discusses in her article that strong women in the media have to be lesbians:

I'm allowed to say this because I'm secretly gay too. Or at least I try to be. What choice do I have? Apparently "lesbian" is now the de facto label for any woman who asserts her own tastes and opinions and does not necessarily need to get married tomorrow. Granted, this might be confusing for people who lack opinions and their own tastes, and are desperate to settle down, but happen to be actual lesbians. But, according to the current cultural mind-set, a heterosexual woman who has her act together simply does not exist in nature.
Is it any wonder, then, that we (at least we in the media, who have high rates of secret lesbianism) are so fascinated by Batwoman's newest incarnation? DC Comics might be touting the idea of diversity, but I suspect what we're really seeing is an antidote to the rampant girliness of our era presented — how's this for ironic? — in the safest way possible.
If there's anything scarier than a strong lesbian, it's a strong straight woman. Now there's a superhero we could use.

I understand what Daum is trying to get at: that straight women, or rather femininity, is not viewed in our society as a bastion of strength or success. That in our society, lesbians can fudge the rules a bit, and be viewed as strong because, well, if you're a lesbian, you have to be masculine.

But I have to say, when the label "lesbian" is used in our society, the context is derogatory. Being a lesbian in our society is not a positive thing. When people call Condoleezza Rice (Daum's example) a lesbian, it is because she's being thought of as less of a woman. Are people really impressed with Rice's amount of power? Sure, they may be threatened by her position and whatever power she may yield, and that is because she's a woman. A straight woman. To call her a lesbian is to try to take away some of the power she might have from being in the public eye and serving the current administration. To call her a lesbian is an attempt to further other her and cast her in a bad light.

As far as DC making the current incarnation of Batwoman a lesbian: it's to sell books. DC in no way believes that straight women can't be powerful, that a straight woman superhero isn't the answer to the typical male (straight) superhero. Most of the superhero's that we read about are straight: Wonder Woman is straight, She-Hulk is straight, Phoenix is soo straight, I could go on and on. I can only count on one hand the number of lesbian superhero's I'm aware of.

To say that in our society that only lesbians are allowed to be "powerful" is drastically missing the point. To be a lesbian in our society is about being an outsider. It's about having less privileges. It's about being looked at as just a lesbian-period-and hardly anything else.

Too Easy.

2006-07-19T11:08:00.000-07:00

I know, I know, I know. Complaining about IGN, complaining about this, is too easy. The feature obviously distasteful, noticeably sexist. But I can’t stay away.

I can’t stay away because of the cute blurbs about catfights for wank-fests. And I can’t stay away because of images like these:

So who had this costume first?

Four breasts are better than two:

The pain of wedgies:

and of a disjointed hip:

It’s like a car accident.

Link via When Fangirls Attack.

FYI

2006-07-19T11:06:00.000-07:00

Over at Pretty, Fizzy Paradise is the Second Carnival of Feminist Science Fiction and Fantasy Fans! Kalinara's put together an awesome edition.

Just Can’t get into it (In Which I Complain)

2006-07-17T10:41:00.000-07:00

I’m in a video game slump. My usual routine is that whenever I find a bit of free time, I position myself on the couch, fire up on of the consoles or my DS and get lost in hours of fantasy. But the past couple of weeks—ever since I finished Baten Kaitos—it hasn’t been so.

I’ve started Xenogears. I figured since I’ve enjoyed the Xenosagas and Baten that I should try out their predecessor—but often I find that when I’m playing it, I’m bored. I don’t know if it’s the PS1 graphics, the more typical fighting engine, the lack of female characters...Whatever it is, my heart isn’t in it. Playing feels like a chore.

After renting it for months on end, I finally purchased a copy of Pikmin 2. I love the premise of the game: plucking Pikmin out of the ground, fighting off bugs with the big, fat purple ones, discovering and towing home treasures, such as little pots of Carmex. Alas, I’m finding that after playing it for about an hour or so, I get bored.

I’ve tried watching Shions_Glasses play Fable. I’ve enjoyed watching him play other games, why not this one? Once again, I’m not sure if it’s the deficiency of women characters (I’m notorious for developing apathy when I don’t have a good female character to latch on to) or the lack of a good, strong plot: I watch Shion play, I fall asleep.

We haven’t finished Silent Hill 4 yet, but I’m not really in the mood to.

I have a copy of Beyond Good and Evil, which I know I really need to play, but I don’t want to.

Maybe my problem is that I need an RPG—maybe subconciously longing for immersion, for total addiction. I just finished my summer class and have nothing really important to do before my trip—it’s perfect timing for hours and hours of play. So, Digital Devil Saga? I wanted to buy it used, but found that the first one is super-expensive. Tales of Legendia? Not cheap enough yet. I was tempted to buy the Game Boy release of Tales of Phantasia, but cringed at that price. Why are they charging $30 for a Game Boy game? Which brings me to the DS—nothing’s appealing to me there either. I’ve started up Animal Crossing, but with half-interest.

It’s my first gaming slump in a long, long while. Sadness.

IGN: Digging a Deeper Hole, One Slice of Cheesecake at a Time

2006-07-13T15:47:00.000-07:00

I don't know if someone's already wrote about this before--the article is kind of old--but I inadvertantly and unfortunately came across IGN's: Top Ten X-Babes while wandering around the internet.

Never before have I cackled (while experiencing rage and alienation all at the same time).

Yet, I can't tell what's more insulting: the blurbs or being reminded of the way that some of my favorite female characters have been drawn.

Japan, Ho!

2006-07-13T08:29:00.000-07:00

After Tuesday, after being on the train that was behind the train the derailed on the blue line, after inhaling black smoke and walking for an hour and a half home, I'm setting my sights forward: in August, I'll be spending three weeks in Japan.

Two of the weeks will be spent staying with a friend in Nagahama, which is near Osaka and Kyoto. It's known for being the home of Toyotomi Hideyoshi's first castle that he built. (You know, the guy who built a castle in a day in Samurai Warriors?)

The third week will be spent in Tokyo. I've reserved a room in a ryokan in Asakusa that is just a few blocks away from the Kaminarimon Gate.

I cannot wait.

When Silver Suns Have Golden Moons

2006-07-06T11:07:00.000-07:00

So I have a confession. I'm playing a X-box game, and kind of enjoying myself. And worse still is that its Fable. This is a game that I totally lambasted when it came out. No female playable character, the lenght is really short, it's on X-box--the usual complaints. But now things have changed.

My brother got himself a new 360, so I got the leftovers. I think because I came into Fable with very low expectations my hopes weren't crushed when I started playing. The best part of the game, by far, is the ability to be queer. I get to chose my sexuality! I no longer have to be forced into the status quo! I can marry my same sex partner, and stroll through the town in my dress with pride. And the fair citizens will cheer for my life choices and high reknown, not knowing that it is I who is breaking into their homes at night and stealing their potions. And it warms my heart that after a hard day of slaying hundreds of Hobbes, I can come home and make love to my wife. Wait a minute, Wife?! I married a dude, game!

So here comes the disappointment: I, too, fell into the Fable trap of high expectations like so many others. I thought that I would enjoy the same benefits of a het relationship. I was wrong. The first thing that pissed me off was that the game continually refers to the love of my life as my wife. How hard would it have been to program the game to change the text depending on the gender of my partner? And here's a thought, why not just call him my partner--it works both ways. It just gives a weird, "this choice was not our focus when we made this game" vibe. A feeling that is furthered by the fact that I don't get a wedding ceremony for my same sex partner. Would that have been so difficult? I just would have liked something, it didn't have to be a wedding, but some cut scene that shows that we are now together, and that this marriage is just as valid as the heterosexual one. I was disappointed after these realizations, but I was still proud that I just married a guy.

So naturally, I wanted to bask in the glory of my newly changed stat. Oh more disappointment, so much disappointment. What was waiting for me when I check my status of sexuality?...GAY. I'm Gay. If I married a women I would be Heterosexual. But now I'm gay. Instead of using the opposite term of homosexual, Lion's Head thought it was best to use a slang term. (A term I was called through my childhood and adolescence.) I wouldn't have cared if the other option was straight, but no, they use the scientific name for that. But me, I'm gay. So there it is. So close but so far away. Well, at least I can be Bisexual.

I have to say that I am very impressed that Lion's Head added same sex marriage into the game. In a game based around the choices you make, its only natural to allow for more than one sexual preference. I can't think of many other games that allow this, and have it be such a large, interactive part of the game. I just wish that they would have put more effort into the "gay" experience.

And the Award for Most Offensive Ad Campaign Goes to...

2006-07-06T10:18:00.000-07:00

First there was this:

Now blac(k)ademic alerts us to this:

The Sony PSP: Classist, Sexist, and Racist.

Click on over to blac(k)ademic for Sony's mailing info.

UPDATE: Jacob has informed me that Sony has pulled the PSP white ads and has apologized to those who are offended by it. There's a whole article over at Gamespot.

One Year Old: Robotech Repost

2006-07-05T23:26:00.000-07:00

I've realized that it's been a year since I started blogging--in the beginning I had a Xanga blog. It took a few months for me to figure out that Blogger was better than Xanga, which prompted my move. I'm glad I did--switching to Blogger has made me part of a larger community, one that I can partake in and learn from. Thanks to everyone who's made me feel welcomed, and thank you to everyone who stops by.

In honor of blogging about feminism and pop culture for a year, I'm re-posting a favorite Xanga entry of mine: my first shot at reviewing a comic.
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From October 11, 2005

A Review of Robotech: Prelude to the Shadow Chronicles

We've all been waiting a good, long time for the next installation of the Robotech Universe and with the first issue of Robotech: Prelude to the Shadow Chronicles, it has begun.

The Cover: It's okay--I don't think it accurately betrays Omar Dogan's talent however. Rick's head is way too small for his body, it doesn't work with the perspective. Also it seems so cluttered, but I do admit that I am a fan of minimalistic covers that go for the visual bang.

The Art and Coloring: Excellent. I love Dogan's work and the colors are vibrant. There's an anime quality, but it's not just "cheap imitation." Definately eye candy.

Character Designs: They're alright. However, I'm not too much of a fan of the uniform--they're not snazzy like they were in the original Macross series, however. Lisa looks good, though not too much older. (Are they afraid to draw an attractive 40-50 something woman? Are wrinkles that unsightly?) Rick does look older and very manly which I'm somewhat disappointed with. I loved how in the original anime he was shorter and more slender than the other characters--plus when you're Admiral, do you really need to be so beefy? Jean Grant's design is good, but what's with that huge purple bow? We don't really get to see Minmei, just the back of her head with a hairstyle that looks way too similar to what it was in her little movie in the original. It's kind of like "Look! I'm Chinese because I have this oriental hair piece!" All in all, it's a mixed bag.

Story: Here's where it gets complicated. I can handle flawed character designs and goofy covers but....well wait, I'm getting ahead of myself. There's an amount of back story missing when we start off, which is okay, I can deal with that. Either the movie or future issues will handle this. However, I don't think we'll get a step-by-step story that deals with "From the Stars" to this issue, but there doesn't need to be. There's lots of science lingo, mystery and governmental council bickering. There's blood, death, and drama. I'll wait to learn more before I judge these aspects of the storyline--there's only one thing I have a contention with: the treatment of Lisa or rather the attitude of "We don't know how to write for female characters--especially the strong ones!"

What is painfully obvious is that they're going to make Lisa Rick's motivation. She deserves more than that--they did such a good job with her in the original series. To make her pregnant, hurt/hospitalized and miscarry is just rediculous. It's akin to what Lucas did to Padme in Star Wars. They take their strongest woman character--Lisa is the head in command--and make her weak and pregnant. Even though this is the future the problem of women handling family and career has not yet been solved (and neither have the problems with pregnancy been solved either.) We then have Rick saying something along the lines of "I can't wait for Lisa to resign her commission--you can't be Admiral and a mother." This drives me mad--Lisa's father could be Admiral and a father--the double standards, I don't get it. Oh right, Lisa's a lady. Okay, so we start the story off with Lisa and the SDF-3 getting shot down by Edwards, this in turn establishes Rick's hatred for Edwards and then puts Rick in position to be the leading Admiral. I understand that Yune and others are working somewhat with a preexisting story--they have to put the pieces together. However, it's lazy writing to take out your strongest female character, to make her just a womb that has been victimized.

And did anyone else think that the scene where Jean tells Rick about the Lost Baby is horribly trite?

I'm ranting, and it's probably pretty uncomprehensible, but bear with my anger. It's just that I'm so disappointed--I had expected too much, I guess. I was suprised when I went to read the message boards at Robotech.com how many people were so sad about the miscarriage etc. etc.
I will continue to read the rest of the series and I will see the movie. I will remain, however, apprehensive about the treatment of Robotech's female characters.
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Just to note: I did stop reading the comics and I haven't seen the movie yet. I'm a little afriad to.

The First Ever Carnival of Feminist Science Fiction and Fantasy Fans

2006-07-02T10:44:00.000-07:00

Comics, games, and TV, oh my! Make sure you check out The First Carnival of Feminst Science Fiction and Fantasy Fans for a tour around the interweb by Ragnell the Foul herself.

Some of the topics discussed under the big top: Star Trek, gaming and genderbending, X-3, Joss Whedon and of course, Black Canary's fishnets.

Etta is a Role Model

2006-06-30T10:13:00.000-07:00

Recently at Written World, Ragnell expressed her appreciation for the Golden Age Etta Candy. I’ve loved that incarnation of Etta ever since I came across her: her strength and self-confidence. How she always knew what she wanted. She was a leader, and could help Wonder Woman out of a bind. And most importantly, she took up space.

How could I not write a poem for her? (Granted, at the time when I tried to bring in a Wonder Woman-themed poem every week into my advanced workshop. I admit I'm a bit embarrassed to post this poem, since it's pretty different from the way I usually write. I just had to rhyme it, Golden Age dialogue is so wonderfully cheesy.)

I echo Ragnell’s sentiments, I want Etta returned to her initial self.

Wonder Woman’s Sidekick: Etta Candy

“When you’ve got a man, there’s nothing you can do with him—but candy you can eat.” --Etta Candy

A former patient of Diana Prince’s,
fan-favorite Etta Candy wasn’t your typical sidekick.
She wasn’t quick, strong, or righteous,
was rather, instead, addicted to three things—
sweets, girls and Wonder Woman.

Leader of the sorority sisters, the Holliday Girls,
Etta with her scout smarts and red bloomers
could be contacted by mental radio,
would come to untie Wonder Woman with her enthusiastic “Woo Woo!”

Etta assembled an army of one-hundred glamorous girls,
who she lorded over with a plump fist and box of bonbons.
Together they defeated Dr. Poison’s lecherous horde,
then promptly threw a magnificent slumber party as an award.

In 1986, dear Etta was given a facelift—
she lost pounds, height and self-esteem.
Etta got stationed as an Air Force Lieutenant, instead of queen,
and married Wonder Woman’s longtime boyfriend, Steve.

Ugh.

2006-06-27T08:33:00.000-07:00

The other day I found some interesting stats that David J. Leonard used in his article, "Not a Hater, Just Keepin' It Real: The Importance of Race-and Gender-Based Game Studies" that are originally from Children Now's Fair play? Violence, gender and race in video games, a study from 2002. Needless to say, the stats are a little dated, but I think the results are still extremely important to consider.

EDIT: As Steven points out in his comment, it seems odd that there would be such a low percentage of Asian/Pacific Islanders in video games when so many games are made in Japan. I'm having a hard time finding the Children Now's study without having to pay for it, so I can't find out exactly what games they were looking at. My hunch is that the percentages are from American-made video games.

Here's a link to Leonard's article. On the right sidebar, you can download the pdf.

In 2002:
• 64% of platform game characters were male
• 19% were nonhuman
• 17% were female, 50% of which were props or bystanders

• 50% of player-controlled characters were White males
• less than 40% were black, the majority of which were athletic competitors
• less than 5% were Latino
• 3% were Asian/Pacific Islander
• no multiracial or Native Americans

• 80% of female player-controlled characters are White
• less than 10% were Black
• 7% were Asian/Pacific Islander
• less than 1% Native American
• no Latinas
• When Black women appear in video games, 90% function as props, bystanders or victims

Swoon

2006-06-26T07:57:00.000-07:00

I admit, I was skeptical when I heard that Catwoman was going to be a mom. In fact, I was kind of pissed. A short list of my frustrations regarding motherhood:
1) The societal pressure that every woman should have kids
2) The perception that you aren't a real woman until you have a kid
3) Once you do have kids you can't win, be it the division between work and home, staying at home--No matter what, it's impossible to be the perfect mother, yet our society expects nothing less

It's the kind of topic that makes me want to hide my head in the sand. But then I read Ragnell's series of Mama-thon posts, and then I read this post over at P.M. McRae's Take Back The Knight (which is hosted by the invaluable Girl-wonder.org). I realized that comics could help me sort out my (ill) thoughts towards motherhood, and that I owed it to myself to check out Catwoman.

I love it. Catwoman is my absolute favorite comic right now. The covers, the art, the dialogue, the story--all perfect. I adore the characters and I appreciate how Selina is portrayed as a mother.

And this page from issue 55 is the absolute best:

Deja Vu

2006-06-22T08:55:00.000-07:00

From Ultimate X-Men #71:

"I think Ms. Grey constructed split personalities to help her deal with having mutant powers. Nothing more."

My first thought: "God! They just can't go the route of X-3!"

And while the Ultimate's Phoenix storyline clearly won't, I was reminded all too often how comics have to make room for their blockbuster counterparts. I know the movies probably bring in a good deal of readers--hell, the early 90's Fox cartoon was my introduction to X-Men comics--I can't help but wonder what kind of pressure there is to include (awful) elements from the movies.

Girl Gamers, Once More

2006-06-20T13:15:00.000-07:00

The Escapist’s new issue out this week called Girl Power 2, is dedicated to women and gaming. Disappointedly, as Lake Desire has already pointed out, only one article in the issue is written by a woman (it’s a great one, an essay by Bonnie Ruberg that looks at young girls as avatars.)

The only other article I’ve had time to peruse was John Walker’s “Asexuality Actually.” One of the main points of his article is “that the majority of games we play don’t enforce sexual stereotype, gender biases or sexist principles”—that rather, instead, our conceived notions that video games are just for guys has been fed continuously by the media. True enough that the media treats geek girls as anomalies, but are the majority of the games out there asexual (?), or rather, unbiased, instead of being in favor of men and masculinity?

Walker backs up his claim with a list of games he’s carefully chosen:
Worms, Roller Coaster Tycoon, Psychonauts, Zoo Keeper, The Settlers III, Darwinia, IL-2 Sturmovik: Forgotten Battles, Day of the Tentacle, Ratchet & Crank, Meteos, City of Heroes, Civilization, Microsoft Flight Simulator, The Sims, EVE Online, Crazy Taxi, Myst III: Exile, Descent, Mario Power Tennis, Mutant Storm, Sonic the Hedgehog, Metroid Prime, Tetris, Links 2003 and Fallout 2.

I could quibble with him about a couple of games on his list, but I can see what he’s getting at. If I looks at the list of current popular games off of GameSpot :
Prey, The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion, Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots, Tom Clancy’s Ghost Recon Advanced Warfighter, Formula One 06, S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl, Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, World of Warcraft, Super DBZ.

I’m not really struck by a lot of these games being gender-neutral. Sure, some are better than others, but some are undoubtedly sexist.

Walker also writes briefly of a “permission barrier” between girls and gaming, in regards to Schott and Thomas who found that girls were hesitant to pick up Game Boy Advances. I wish he would have spent more time on this study (with a link), but I think it demonstrates something important. Even if a girl or woman is attracted to video games, she might be hesitant to pick it up, for whatever different reasons. I was always afraid of trying a new game in front of my brother and his friends because if I wasn’t good, I feared I’d be made fun of for 1) sucking and 2) being a girl. Still today I’m hesitant to join in a round of gaming when my partner has his brothers over because of the exact same reasons. Which brings up another point that I feel could have made it into the article: beyond games themselves, and beyond the media, there is video game culture. Yes, chicken and egg and all that, but it’s important to recognize that women and girls could possibly be deterred by the attitude that uses “pussy” (et al) as a synonym for poor playing (just to scratch the surface). The outlook that uses Dead or Alive to claim that video games are a medium for men—women have shoes, manicures and, you know, Sex in the City.

I appreciate a lot of what Walker has to say in his article, and I too want to see videogames as being an “acceptable pastime for both sexes.” I just can’t help but feel that there’s a steep incline to achieving it.

Commercial Activity

2006-06-14T12:21:00.000-07:00

Tim from Old Grandma Hardcore has a great new post that deconstructs Kevin Brown’s speech at the Focus on Gaming Advertising Summit. While reading it I was reminded of Guilded Lily’s post that she wrote back in March that summed up her own thoughts about advertising and what advertisements might look like in games that want to reach the female demographic.

One of my favorite parts about games, (or even in other genres, such as anime) is noticing the fake brands and stores—they enhance the atmosphere and provide little clues as to how the fictional world that I’m becoming immersed in is similar or different to our own. I don’t think that advertisements for Pot Belly’s or Sketchers would heighten the realism of a game; instead it’ll just remind me of my real life, which in turn would hamper the pleasure of escapism that comes with playing games.

Living in Chicago, the amount of advertising I take in during my morning commute is overwhelming. The first thing I see when I descend the staircase of the El are the vending machines that crowd around the turnstile. After I insert my fare card, I push the turnstile bars which are now clear: presently, there’s a slipped in ad for Geico. To find an empty place to wait for a train, I walk over numerous vinyl advertisement mats that now cover the concrete of the subway platform. The wall opposite from where I stand is also plastered in ads. After the train arrives and I step in, it’s impossible for me not to notice the ads that line the perimeter of the car. There are also ads placed in the areas where there are no windows. There are now commercials in the tunnels—what was once black spaces are now ads that work like flipbooks. After I reach my stop and navigate through another area of ad space, I climb the stairs and am greeted by billboards: typical billboards, billboards on the side of buildings, billboards that are stationed like stop signs. Buses, with their own set of ads pasted to them, pass by bus stops that encase ads instead of bus maps. This is just the first half hour being out of my apartment.

And what about sexist advertising? The ads that I encounter are for everything, but of course I notice the most objectifying: a naked woman sitting—she’s in the shape of a cognac bottle. An ad for lotion is centered on a pair of breasts. Another ad, this time for citrus vodka, features a woman being peeled like an orange. I’m not even going to write about the ads for make up, clothing and perfume. You know what I’m writing about: the idea that women are commodities, billboards in their own right. And that beauty and anything that is good and worthwhile is rich, white, blond, tan, thin, and straight. I’m oversaturated.

Yet as much as I don’t want advertising in games, I know all to well that it’s inevitable.

Cover Girl

2006-06-12T09:54:00.000-07:00

Recently, I was nagged by a co-worker to pick up Whiteout for the great story and lead female character. I'd heard a lot about it, so I decided to--finally--order it used and cheap off the internet. It arrived the other day. Excited, I tore open the box and set my eyes on this:

Visible breasts (separated and lifted!) underneath a parka? I know it's a parka, the comic takes place in Antarctica. I'd thought my co-worker told me she wasn't sexualized in the comic. (I do have to say, after flipping through the comic it appears as though she really isn't). And what the hell is wrong with her lips?

Thanks Frank Miller!

Weirdest RPG. Ever.

2006-06-10T22:24:00.000-07:00

I've always wanted to play Baten Kaitos--probably since I finished the first Xenosaga. I received Baten for Christmas, but haven't gotten around to it until now.

I have to say, it's the strangest RPG I've ever played. It's not the characters or the so-so story. Rather, it's the atmosphere and the details, the different worlds that you travel to. (I don't want to ruin any surprises for anyone who hasn't played.) All I can say is: bizarre.

I'm really hooked. I wasn't sure how I'd like the card base battle system, but I love it. I actually look forward to dungeons because I never know which cards will come up.

So far there hasn't been any big problems in regards to gender. The main character is a whiney guy who ends up joining a young girl on her quest. I have my own role in the game as a spirit guide--something I really like. I don't have to identify closely with the main character, and I get the opportunity to choose my own name and gender. As far as I can tell, the story doesn't change depending on what gender you chose. (Gender parity? Score!)

There has been the requisite tassel-on-breasts-boss, and a brand new member in my group's party seems to be filling in the role of femme fatale, but on the whole I have to say that I've been pretty happy.

Control

2006-06-05T14:59:00.000-07:00

I don't know if I should admit it for reasons of sheer nerdity, but one thing I like to do after beating a video game is to visit its wikipedia page. Shions_Glasses and I finished Resident Evil 4 about a month ago, and when I browsed through RE 4's pages I came upon this:

Many feel the game may have even been less tense and frightening just because of how "in control" Leon feels in the game, lending the game more of a 'survival action', rather than 'survival horror', element.

I found RE 4 to be more intense than the other Resident Evil games, mainly because of the number of people that you have to plow your way through, but I found that I was creeped out more by the remake of the original Resident Evil. I'm thinking that I felt more secure during 4 because we could carry more items and had ammo and first aid sprays to spare.

What do you think? Did you feel more control while playing as Leon? Did you feel threatened when you played as different characters (such as Jill)? Or is Resident Evil 4 such a departure from the earlier games that it's hard to compare?

I have to admit though, either way, those Regenerators were really freaky.

Couldn't Stand It.

2006-05-30T09:47:00.000-07:00

I saw X-Men: The Last Stand on Friday and hated it. I wasn't going to blog about it, since I already feel that I've wasted enough time watching it. (There was no point--everything that happened gets overturned by the end of the movie.)

If you're interested in reading thought-out reviews or discussions check out the May 29th links from When Fangirls Attack.

Just a couple of observations from when I was watching the movie: (Spoilers apply)
--I was already prepared for the deaths, but not at the way they were handled. How come Professor X seemed so ridiculously weak?
--I burst out laughing when they explained Jean's Xavier-induced schizophrenia. Classic case of the hysterical woman.
--The depiction of Storms powers and fighting abilities were terrible. (And that's just the tip of the iceberg.)
--I didn't even realize "Callisto" was in the movie until I talked with some friends --if you can even call her Callisto.
--X-Men killing people?
--I agree with others out there that the movie should have just been "the cure" storyline. A Dark Phoenix storyline is too big and should have had it's own flick.

I could go on, but it was utterly disappointing to watch such a messy and misogynistic movie when the first two of the series were so close in portraying the essence of the comics that I grew up with.

My Soapbox on Ethnocentricity and Maiden Love Revolution

2006-05-25T23:09:00.000-07:00

I was scrolling through Feministing this morning when I came to this post. It speaks briefly about a game coming out in Japan called Maiden Love Revolution that features

the role of 220-pound Hitomi Sakurakawa as she struggles to slim down - mostly by restricting her diet. To advance, Hitomi must count calories and increase her exercise. The game keeps stats on her progress and ultimately rewards her conformity with a boyfriend.

I was struck by a comment that followed which stated "the Japanese are very strange people." I see this type of comment often (there's a lot of posts out there on the latest ridiculous game or what have you from Japan) and it really gets to me. Yeah, I post all the time on misogynistic stuff that irks me, and I'm not defending this game--particularly because of the subject matter, and also because it sounds boring and dumb. However, I want to point out that it's important to consider ethnocentricity, when criticizing or analyzing something from another culture.

I'm no expert on Japanese culture, but I know that there's a lot of different genres and categories that feature games that wouldn't fly here in the US. It's important to note that subjects like sex aren't viewed in the same way in Japan as it is here--we have separate cultures--but in the same breath, it's important to recognize that Japan is a patriarchy, just like the US. We might not make sex games or weight loss games, or promote such titles in our mainstream culture, but we're not innocent.

People are quick to judge other culture's problems, which turn out to be similar to the problems that we have. (See: cultural relativism.)

UPDATE: Lake Desire over at New Game Plus makes some great points about the premise of the game, one being that it stigmatizes overweight people from dating.

Smash

2006-05-23T08:02:00.000-07:00

Over at A Blog Found on a Garbage Heap, inspired by the post "And he's hot, too...," I commented on how at my job, I deal with over 100 different faculty members. It can get hairy, and I end up getting pissed off a lot, especially because we've had problems with harassment. In order to help deal with the frustration I've taped up this picture of the Hulk so that my rage can be experienced vicariously. (This isn't the first time I've done something like this. When I was in high school I started carrying around a Hulk Pez dispenser when my parents got divorced.):

We've temporarily relocated the office this summer, so I thought I'd print out a new picture. I thought this time a picture of She-Hulk would be better. I dumbly searched in Google images for it. I say dumb because this is what I came up. (What I'm comfortable with posting, that is.):

Lame. After much searching however, I did find this:

Much better.

A Family Tragicomic

2006-05-19T11:05:00.000-07:00

It took an afternoon locked out of my apartment to get me to walk the twenty minutes to Quimby's. I'm glad I did because I happened upon Alison Bechdel's new comic Fun Home.

Here's a little blurb about it from Publisher's Weekly: This autobiography by the author of the long-running strip, Dykes to Watch Out For, deals with her childhood with a closeted gay father, who was an English teacher and proprietor of the local funeral parlor. Fun Home refers both to the funeral parlor, where he put makeup on the corpses and arranged the flowers, and the family's meticulously restored gothic revival house, filled with gilt and lace, where he liked to imagine himself a 19th-century aristocrat.

It is amazing. The art, my god, the writing. I'm totally in love with it and am taking my time with it, pouring over every panel, gesture and word balloon.

Weekend Without Shame

2006-05-09T17:04:00.000-07:00

Was I studying for my finals this weekend? Hell no, I attended Anime Central on Friday and Saturday.

Brief Observations:

--Genshiken is a beautiful and interesting anime--I don't see it as simply a look at the "otaku lifestyle" of Japan, it's a study of masculinity for young men that aren't traditionally masculine. Definitely brings up difficult issues (like hentai) and good questions, with a backdrop of superb animation and humor.

--There seemed to be even more cross-playing this year. Lots of young teenage boys dressed up in Sailor Moon and Kagome costumes, very cute.

--I attended a shonen-ai panel: I really can't get into shonen-ai, but I learned a lot, specifically the differences between the perspective of western audiences versus eastern audiences. The best part was when a young gay man stood up and spoke out against top/bottom relationships--saying that they're insulting to homosexual relationships because such pairings are reduced to sex, and that they evoke traditional unhealthy heterosexual relationships where all power is placed on the masculine. (He received lots of applause from everyone at the panel.)

--I saw lots of Lunar cosplayers!